Chicago, Atlanta and Dallas

 As promised here are my likes and dislikes with the remaining teams in the NBA playoffs:

Chicago

Rose: as already noted at Christmas time, I have changed my tune on him.  Incredibly explosive.  Like a rubber ball.  Still a shaky shooter but can beat anyone to the hoop.  Shows that you can overcome the coaching of Calipari.

Noah: Not the asshole I thought (I'm rarely wrong… and when I am I don't admit it!). Can't shoot (jump shot looks like the planets revolving around the sun!), has no offence but plays his ass off.  Energy galore.  Energizer bunny.  Needs a haircut and a shave, so not to look so French.

Boozer: WTF is with that hairline. Battier and him both look like their hairlines begins around their nose.  It that a Dook thing? Body by Charles Atlas.  As stated he's a Dookie so he's got that against him.  Hot and cold.  With those shoulders he should get every rebound.  Tries using his Dook brain instead of his obvious brawn.  That's why he only get about 5 rebounds a game.

Bogans:  Just happy to be there.

Deng: Another Dookie.  Should be better than he is. Usually look confused. He has that African 'I need a meal' look on his face. Can't dribble.  WTF Ratface, don't teach them to dribble at Dook? 

Big White Stiff Backup Center ( Buddy What's his name) - enough said

Gibson: WTF is with that first name?

Korver: Ashton Kutcher lookalike.  Too bad he often shoots like him. 

Atlanta

Smith: Every basket he scores results in him preening, strutting and generally acting like a horse's ass.  Please Josh, shoot another three… please … please!

Johnson: Not really worth 80 million is he?  Just a tad overrated.  Occasionally good, mostly average, sometimes sucky.  Not a good ratio for an alleged super star.

Horford: A really good player, playing out of position with a bunch of knuckleheads.  Would be a superstar at power forward.  Love his game.  His dad was a stiff.

Teague: Grudge against him from his days at Wake Forrest.  He beat Carolina once, that's enough for me.  His brother is better and he is in High School.  That's not good for Atlanta.

J. Collins: Him and his twin brother suck.  That would be double suckage.  

Crawford: Where to begin?  A raging shoot-a-holic.  Unfortunately not a make-a-holic.  Michigan man.  Not aware of how bad he is.  Delusional.  He is under the assumption that he is great.  He is incorrect.

Zaza: It is not a good sign that the other Zsa Zsa (Gabor) rebounds better than him.  He's got that 5 o'clock shadow going 24/7.  He was made for the EBA (European Basketball Association).

Williams: Should have stayed at Carolina more than one year.  Has not fulfilled his potential.  Carolina man, so I won't be too harsh on him.

Larry Drew (alleged coach): Jerk.  Bad parent.  Lousy coach.  What else…? Bad dresser.  Reason: read about what him and son did to Carolina this year. 

Dallas

Dirk: I think his nickname should be 'Diddler', for obvious reasons.  Best 7 foot shooter in history.  Has made himself a good rebounder.  Defense is deplorable.  If he was guarding Hitler, the allies would have gotten him in no time.  Couldn't guard a statue.  

Chandler: Tough guy.  Wants to fight everyone.  Can't wait until him and Perkins go at it.  Could be a Texas cage match.  Can't shoot, but defends well and rebounds.  Used to be a bigger horse's ass, but has matured a bit.

Marian: Rob's favorite player… not!   Interesting jump shot.  Who the hell taught him that?  Not the player he was before but can guard and will score enough to keep his man honest.  Should have stayed in Phoenix with Stevie Noosh. 

Terry:  See Crawford for description of Terry.  Love how he has his headband a little cockeyed (that one is for Dom!). I must admit he doesn't hurt his team the way Crawford does.  Still, he was coached by Lute Olsen (WTF is up with that name?), so for him to be successful means he had to overcome a lot. 

Barrea:  Who is going to knock this guys head off next?  Everyone is lining up to take a shot at this poor bastard.  What did he do to deserve this?

Stevenson: Nice neck tattoo you gangster.  Lucky to have a job.  Will be incarcerated as soon as he is out of the league.

Kidd: A great player who plays hard, and says nothing.  Hall of fame.  They used to call him Robo-guard when he was in high school.  I liked that!  Just think how great he would have been if he could shoot.  Scary.  

Haywood: Carolina man.  Zero offense, some defense.  Has played about a dozen years in the Association.  Can you believe all the money he has made with so little talent other than being 7 feet tall.  He should thank God every day that Coach Smith made him a player. 

     My hope is that OKC and Chicago play in the finals. That means that Dallas and Miami will be in the finals. Bet the house on it.