We have always been told that we all are special in the eyes of the Lord. Apparently their are many, many people in this world that are much more special than I am. Here are a few that I have had the pleasure of recently:
- the special people who park wherever they want. There may be a 'No Parking' sign, but that doesn't apply to them. Be it in front of the drug store; by the door at the bank; in a 'Disabled Parking' zone; or taking up 2/3 spots. Obviously these people are very special and do not feel the need to follow the rules or signs. If questioned, they usually answer that they "JUST had to run in for a minute." Fuck you!
- the special people that take more than 15 items to the express lane at the grocery store. My question is this: are they illiterate or just plain stupid? They either can't read or they can't comprehend. A lady working at Safeway told me that some old women came to the Express Lane and had over $600 worth of groceries. Punishment for that should be death!
How about those special drivers out there?
- you know the ones that drive in the asshole lane. That's the lane that ends. The assholes; who don't like having to wait, drive in it anyways. Then some fucking smuck lets them in and they get reinforced that they are special. This is also know as the Brian Parasynchuk lane. (He says he loves that lane and says "Bye suckers"). I say run them into the ditch or preferably; a light post.
- those special people who are too stupid to understand merging. Merging does not mean that you get to go in front of everyone else, asshole. It mean you are to get into the lane when it is safe. This is the classic road bully who just pushes his way in.
- how about those special people with nicer cars than me and obviously were given a park this way (\) instead of this way (l) pass. Now I understand that there are a lot of morons who bang your car doors with theirs; however, that doesn't give you the right to take up two lanes. If it is such a problem, stay the fuck at home! Your choice.
- those ever considerate people who are too special to turn off their cell phone in public. Thanks asshole!
- even worst is the special people that insist that we listen to their phone conversations. Apparently these phone conversations are so important that they must talk loud enough for everyone to hear; as well as go on for half an hour. Wow, riveting stuff. Tell me more...
- isn't it fun to sit in a restaurant and listen to some loud mouth special person who doesn't have the brains or grace to understand that no one else in the entire establishment wants to hear his life story. But he goes on and on and on and.... Shut the fuck up!
-I love people who come to social events at the last minute and disrupt everyone by trying to get a really good seat. Then they look around stunned that there is no seats available for them, front and center. It's like they are expecting everyone to leave a seat just for them.
- I love people who are so special that they really think that store clerks or bank tillers want to hear their life story. Meanwhile everyone in line gets to sit there, stewing. Blah, blah, blah. My friend Daniel, from Switzerland, was in a bank in Sherwood Park and some jerk was telling the tiller his life story. Daniel yelled at him "Hey, hurry up. Everyone here wants to get their money." They threw Daniel out of the bank. How wrong is that?
- here's an oldie but a goodie: dog owners who do not pick up their dog's crap. Of course all dog owners will deny that they would ever do that. So how come the world is strewn with dog shit everywhere?
- how about those special people who walk down the middle of the parking lot without the slightest idea that there might be a car driving... in the parking lot. La-di-da. They stroll along, like they don't have a care in the world. Then they look at you like "WTF. What are doing in this parking lot?" How about this: get the fuck out of the way, fat ass! Wal-Mart is particularly bad for this one. Yokels and hillbillies. Special yokels and special hillbillies.
Now the answer to why all of these special people do all of these things: BECAUSE THEY WANT TO. It's simple. Selfish people doing selfish things. It's a selfish world overrun with selfish people. That is why I live in a bubble.
Monday, November 29, 2010
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Fav-er
I have disliked Brett Favre his entire career. I loath him. I always believed he was tremendously overrated. I am truly loving the storm surrounding him this year, both on and off the field. Loving it so much I can barely wipe the shit-eating grin off of my face. No athlete deserves it more than 'Mr. Retirement'.
First off, the fact that he randomly changes around the the letters in his name, really, really pisses me off. His name is spelled F-a-v-r-e. How the fuck do you Far-ve out of that? Now my son the theoretical linguist tells me that there are examples in some early languages in the Middle East, that do change the last consonant around. Fucking Fav-er comes from Mississippi, not the Middle East. The French don't; the Cajuns don't. So how come 'M. R.' just arbitrarily decides to change his name? That's easy: HE DOES WHATEVER HE WANTS. That's why. Always has, always will.
I listen to a lot of sports talk on satellite radio and they often amuse themselves by ranking the greatest quarterbacks in NFL history. M. R. is always ranked in the top ten. I have been watching NFL football for over 40 years, going back to the dominant Packer days of the mid-sixties. I am pretty sure I could name 10-15 quarterbacks better than M. R. I am not saying that he wasn't a great players in his day, but he soon became a player of diminishing results. For every great play he would fuck two up. As the years have gone by he has become much more of a liability to his team.
His last years with the Packers were not good (How wonderful must the Packers feel to have gotten rid of that albatross from around their necks? And they even have a great QB now to replace M.R.). His time with the Jets was a disaster and even though he had a fantastic year last year, he eventually fucked it up. This year has proven that he is done. He has been horrible. He has had 17 INTs, as well as his usual bad decision after bad decision. His off the field problems have proven to be a tremendous distraction, be it the sitch-ee-ay-shun of the cell phone and the scrumpet, not coming to camp in the summer, or not liking the coach and finally being a very big reason that Chilly was fired.
I love to see M.R. throw INTs when he tries to 'thread the needle' through 4-5 defenders. He just can't help himself. He has to be the hero. Winning isn't enough. He has to be the reason they win the game. The V's have the best running back in the league. Adrian Peterson is the best; sorry Chris Johnson. He led the league in rushing before M.R. came to town, but now Fav-er needs to be the show, so AP doesn't get the ball enough. First down gets 2 yards which suite M.R. fine because now he gets to throw the fucking ball around and be the star. Even the lousy QBs in the league come to the line and try to read what the defense is doing, but not M.R. He comes up and barely looks at the defense. All the better for ad-libbing. That way he can be the hero. As I have already said in another blog; you throw enough shit against the wall and some of it will stick. He wins some games with his bullshit but...
How he loves to be the center of attention. "Ohhh, I think I will retire." "Ohhhh, maybe I'll play." "Ohhhhh I don't know what I'll do." "Won't someone please come and beg me to play?" What a fucking joke. And the teams just come a runnin, waving millions of dollars at him. And he knows that he is the one in control. He is always bigger than the team. He knows it, the coach knows it and his teammates know it. He gets the team to bring in players he wants (Randy Moss!), and he gets coaches fired. What a power trip he is on.
He should have quit after the debacle of the NFC championship game last year. True to his selfish personality, Fav-er had to do something to screw his team. They had the game won. They were within field goal range and a victory. But of coarse this wasn't good enough for M.R. Oh no, he had to get his fingerprints on the victory. Can't let the kicker get the glory, right Brett? No he had to be the hero and throw a horrible pass that did not have a chance of being completed. Had to. Another INT and the Saints went marching on!
His selfishness knows no boundaries. He keeps playing to keep his consecutive game streak alive. This has been a complete detriment to his team's success. Several time in the past five years he has played despite not being physically able. This year alone he should have missed at least two or three games. He loves that everyone rants and raves about his toughness and dedication to the game. Bullshit. It is just another way that he gets everyone to look at him and tell him how great he is. Selfish, selfish selfish.
First off, the fact that he randomly changes around the the letters in his name, really, really pisses me off. His name is spelled F-a-v-r-e. How the fuck do you Far-ve out of that? Now my son the theoretical linguist tells me that there are examples in some early languages in the Middle East, that do change the last consonant around. Fucking Fav-er comes from Mississippi, not the Middle East. The French don't; the Cajuns don't. So how come 'M. R.' just arbitrarily decides to change his name? That's easy: HE DOES WHATEVER HE WANTS. That's why. Always has, always will.
I listen to a lot of sports talk on satellite radio and they often amuse themselves by ranking the greatest quarterbacks in NFL history. M. R. is always ranked in the top ten. I have been watching NFL football for over 40 years, going back to the dominant Packer days of the mid-sixties. I am pretty sure I could name 10-15 quarterbacks better than M. R. I am not saying that he wasn't a great players in his day, but he soon became a player of diminishing results. For every great play he would fuck two up. As the years have gone by he has become much more of a liability to his team.
His last years with the Packers were not good (How wonderful must the Packers feel to have gotten rid of that albatross from around their necks? And they even have a great QB now to replace M.R.). His time with the Jets was a disaster and even though he had a fantastic year last year, he eventually fucked it up. This year has proven that he is done. He has been horrible. He has had 17 INTs, as well as his usual bad decision after bad decision. His off the field problems have proven to be a tremendous distraction, be it the sitch-ee-ay-shun of the cell phone and the scrumpet, not coming to camp in the summer, or not liking the coach and finally being a very big reason that Chilly was fired.
I love to see M.R. throw INTs when he tries to 'thread the needle' through 4-5 defenders. He just can't help himself. He has to be the hero. Winning isn't enough. He has to be the reason they win the game. The V's have the best running back in the league. Adrian Peterson is the best; sorry Chris Johnson. He led the league in rushing before M.R. came to town, but now Fav-er needs to be the show, so AP doesn't get the ball enough. First down gets 2 yards which suite M.R. fine because now he gets to throw the fucking ball around and be the star. Even the lousy QBs in the league come to the line and try to read what the defense is doing, but not M.R. He comes up and barely looks at the defense. All the better for ad-libbing. That way he can be the hero. As I have already said in another blog; you throw enough shit against the wall and some of it will stick. He wins some games with his bullshit but...
How he loves to be the center of attention. "Ohhh, I think I will retire." "Ohhhh, maybe I'll play." "Ohhhhh I don't know what I'll do." "Won't someone please come and beg me to play?" What a fucking joke. And the teams just come a runnin, waving millions of dollars at him. And he knows that he is the one in control. He is always bigger than the team. He knows it, the coach knows it and his teammates know it. He gets the team to bring in players he wants (Randy Moss!), and he gets coaches fired. What a power trip he is on.
He should have quit after the debacle of the NFC championship game last year. True to his selfish personality, Fav-er had to do something to screw his team. They had the game won. They were within field goal range and a victory. But of coarse this wasn't good enough for M.R. Oh no, he had to get his fingerprints on the victory. Can't let the kicker get the glory, right Brett? No he had to be the hero and throw a horrible pass that did not have a chance of being completed. Had to. Another INT and the Saints went marching on!
His selfishness knows no boundaries. He keeps playing to keep his consecutive game streak alive. This has been a complete detriment to his team's success. Several time in the past five years he has played despite not being physically able. This year alone he should have missed at least two or three games. He loves that everyone rants and raves about his toughness and dedication to the game. Bullshit. It is just another way that he gets everyone to look at him and tell him how great he is. Selfish, selfish selfish.
I once heard a quote from the drummer of the some band that I don't remember. He was asked what he was thinking about while drumming during a song. He said 'That's easy. LOOK AT ME, LOOK AT ME." That is Brett Fav er to a tee. He is nothing but a raging egomaniac.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Once You've Said Tar Heels ...
I can remember the exact moment that I became a North Carolina Tar Heel fan. When I laid my eyes on the March 17, 1975 issue of Sports Illustrated, I became smitten. The cover had Phil Ford dribbling up the court. On the front it said 'Freshman Phil Ford Kicks Up His Tar Heels'. The color of the Tar Heel's uniform did it for me. Since then I have had a tortured love affair with the Heels; a love affair that often places me on the verge (the bridge).
My heart has been broken so many time that I can not begin to tell you. I am listening to their game right now and they are going to lose to a very average Vanderbilt team. With eight high school all-Americans on their team they are losing to a bunch of guys from Africa and Australia. How does that happen? UNC is doing it to me again.
Last year, Carolina had the worst year in memory. They lost 20 games and were so badly outplayed that even Duke felt sorry for them. After winning the national championship in 2009, they were obviously going to be a different team due to graduation and early departures; however, they sucked so badly that it was often embarrassing. Granted, the expectations were way, way off last year; but, with that much talent, they simply had to produce much more than what they did.
This year's team again is again highly rated, as they got rid of some dead weight and added three more high school AAs. Well, the same old shit is causing the problems. Turnovers, lousy shooting, turnovers, poor perimeter defense, turnovers, a lack of post depth, turnovers, no senior leadership, turnovers and generally lackadaisical play, as well as turnovers, puts their record at 2-2, after getting their asses handed to them twice in Puerto Rico.
I have spent the last hour trying to convince myself that they are not that good and not to get my hopes up this year. I can tell myself all the stories I want, but in the end it kills me that they suck. This is North Carolina. This is a program with a tradition of exemplary play that stretches back to 1967. Coach Dean Smith build the Tar Heel dynasty, and I call it a dynasty because despite winning 'only' four NCAA championships in the past 43 years, UNC has spent almost every year ranked among the top five teams. In almost every season the Tar Heels not only were a dominant factor in the very difficult ACC conference, but they had a real, honest chance to get to the Final Four and win it all. In the 35 years that I have followed Carolina, I can only remember 6 seasons in which the Heels were not a threat to win it all; and two of those years were during the Matt Doherty debacle years (not a real coach!).
Some of the losses still hurt to this day. Beaten in the finals in 77 and 81 were killers. Jordan losing in 83 and 84 was devastating. Five times they lost to the eventual champions, which was of no consolation at all to my sorrow. Fucking Boeheim (Ichabod Crane) and Syracuse in 87 hurt like a kick to the balls and then losing to that old bastard Lute Olsen again the next year ( Lute? WTF kind of name is that?). Reaching the final four in 91, 95, 97, 98, 2000 and 2008 and losing to teams they should have beaten, hurt beyond belief. Georgetown coming back from 15 down with ten minutes left and beating them in OT in 07 was shocking to say the least. Need I go on... and on... and on? George Mason in 06. GEORGE MASON for fuck sakes! You want more? The horror ... the horror...
My last bottom-out day was during the 2009 championship season. They were a dominant team that somehow managed to lose to Maryland in February. The Terps were an ok team, and should not had beaten the eventual NCAA champions. I had had it. I swore that this was the end. I was going to get myself another team. I called the only person who could possibly understand: a former assistant coach (this one really was an assistant coach, not a wanna be) who now is a head coach. I now assist him by being his psychoanalyst and regularly get him off the bridge, so I knew he would be able to help me in my time of need. As I babbled on and on about those gutless, choking, losers; or something to that extent, he asked me a very important questions. If I was to jump ship; whom would I then cheer for? He started throwing out names: Louisville (his favorite)? U Conn? Texas? Dook? Michigan State? Villanova? UCLA? Kentucky? Kansas.? Hmmm? Good question. Let me see...
Louisville? With that weasel Pittno? Would you but a car from him, or go to an Italian restaurant? U Conn? Not with Calhoon the miserable old bastard. Texas? Fucking Barnes tried to pick a fight with Dean Smith one time. Who doesn't love Dean Smith? Dook? Dook? With Rat-face? Those Yuppie sombitches? Absolutely not! Michigan State? Perhaps, I like Tom Izzo. But they always play a little rough for my liking. A bunch of thugs. Villanova? Pretty boy Jay Wright and Philadelphia? Not bloody likely. UCLA? Ya when John Wooden comes back from the grave to coach them. Kentucky? Calipari, that cheating bastard? How is it that the NCAA find something dirty with his programs just after he has left town? Kentucky, you're next, mark my words. Kansas? Na.
So there you are: I am stuck with Carolina. The love affair continues. They will kill me slowly but surely. There is no other choice. I hate everyone else.
Always remember, 'Once you've said Carolina, you've said it all', and 'If God did not love UNC, why is the sky Carolina blue?'
Go Tar Heels!!
My heart has been broken so many time that I can not begin to tell you. I am listening to their game right now and they are going to lose to a very average Vanderbilt team. With eight high school all-Americans on their team they are losing to a bunch of guys from Africa and Australia. How does that happen? UNC is doing it to me again.
Last year, Carolina had the worst year in memory. They lost 20 games and were so badly outplayed that even Duke felt sorry for them. After winning the national championship in 2009, they were obviously going to be a different team due to graduation and early departures; however, they sucked so badly that it was often embarrassing. Granted, the expectations were way, way off last year; but, with that much talent, they simply had to produce much more than what they did.
This year's team again is again highly rated, as they got rid of some dead weight and added three more high school AAs. Well, the same old shit is causing the problems. Turnovers, lousy shooting, turnovers, poor perimeter defense, turnovers, a lack of post depth, turnovers, no senior leadership, turnovers and generally lackadaisical play, as well as turnovers, puts their record at 2-2, after getting their asses handed to them twice in Puerto Rico.
I have spent the last hour trying to convince myself that they are not that good and not to get my hopes up this year. I can tell myself all the stories I want, but in the end it kills me that they suck. This is North Carolina. This is a program with a tradition of exemplary play that stretches back to 1967. Coach Dean Smith build the Tar Heel dynasty, and I call it a dynasty because despite winning 'only' four NCAA championships in the past 43 years, UNC has spent almost every year ranked among the top five teams. In almost every season the Tar Heels not only were a dominant factor in the very difficult ACC conference, but they had a real, honest chance to get to the Final Four and win it all. In the 35 years that I have followed Carolina, I can only remember 6 seasons in which the Heels were not a threat to win it all; and two of those years were during the Matt Doherty debacle years (not a real coach!).
Some of the losses still hurt to this day. Beaten in the finals in 77 and 81 were killers. Jordan losing in 83 and 84 was devastating. Five times they lost to the eventual champions, which was of no consolation at all to my sorrow. Fucking Boeheim (Ichabod Crane) and Syracuse in 87 hurt like a kick to the balls and then losing to that old bastard Lute Olsen again the next year ( Lute? WTF kind of name is that?). Reaching the final four in 91, 95, 97, 98, 2000 and 2008 and losing to teams they should have beaten, hurt beyond belief. Georgetown coming back from 15 down with ten minutes left and beating them in OT in 07 was shocking to say the least. Need I go on... and on... and on? George Mason in 06. GEORGE MASON for fuck sakes! You want more? The horror ... the horror...
My last bottom-out day was during the 2009 championship season. They were a dominant team that somehow managed to lose to Maryland in February. The Terps were an ok team, and should not had beaten the eventual NCAA champions. I had had it. I swore that this was the end. I was going to get myself another team. I called the only person who could possibly understand: a former assistant coach (this one really was an assistant coach, not a wanna be) who now is a head coach. I now assist him by being his psychoanalyst and regularly get him off the bridge, so I knew he would be able to help me in my time of need. As I babbled on and on about those gutless, choking, losers; or something to that extent, he asked me a very important questions. If I was to jump ship; whom would I then cheer for? He started throwing out names: Louisville (his favorite)? U Conn? Texas? Dook? Michigan State? Villanova? UCLA? Kentucky? Kansas.? Hmmm? Good question. Let me see...
Louisville? With that weasel Pittno? Would you but a car from him, or go to an Italian restaurant? U Conn? Not with Calhoon the miserable old bastard. Texas? Fucking Barnes tried to pick a fight with Dean Smith one time. Who doesn't love Dean Smith? Dook? Dook? With Rat-face? Those Yuppie sombitches? Absolutely not! Michigan State? Perhaps, I like Tom Izzo. But they always play a little rough for my liking. A bunch of thugs. Villanova? Pretty boy Jay Wright and Philadelphia? Not bloody likely. UCLA? Ya when John Wooden comes back from the grave to coach them. Kentucky? Calipari, that cheating bastard? How is it that the NCAA find something dirty with his programs just after he has left town? Kentucky, you're next, mark my words. Kansas? Na.
So there you are: I am stuck with Carolina. The love affair continues. They will kill me slowly but surely. There is no other choice. I hate everyone else.
Always remember, 'Once you've said Carolina, you've said it all', and 'If God did not love UNC, why is the sky Carolina blue?'
Go Tar Heels!!
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Red, Yellow, And Green Torture
I will have many blogs concerning driving and traffic. It is the bane of my existence. I believe that I have gotten more tolerant and patient concerning driving; however, I still struggle with wanting to kill everyone on the road except me. My goal is to be like Jim Carey in the movie when he was God. All he did was spread his arms and everyone got out of his way. That's what I want. I want to be the only car on the road and get where I am going without at interruptions.
As I was driving today; through the snow and icy roads, my frustrations mounted when I was forced to sit at an intersection and not get to make a left turn. Who is God's name designed the traffic lights in the Edmonton and Sherwood Park? Are they complete idiots or what?
There is so many problems when making left turns I don't know where to begin. I guess I shall start with the facts that so few street lights have a left turning arrow or a turning lane. Some of them are designed with the spot available for the flashing light or arrow ... but they just don't use it. What the fuck is it there for if they don't use it? Some only use it a certain times of the day. Wonderful. Isn't that great? I can turn left at 3:30 in the afternoon but not at 10:30 in the morning. Oh, I am sure they will tell you that it is based on traffic flow. Bullshit. They decide and manipulate traffic flow for when they want you to turn. If they just had turning lights at all intersections, traffic would move much better.
The lights that have the turning arrows are not much less frustrating. Most Edmonton and Sherwood Park turning lights last 2-3 cars. Which means if you are the fourth car in line, you have to run the light or wait and hope you get through when the light isn't flashing. Now you have some moron at the front of the line doing whatever it is that morons do in the car when they are not paying attention and doesn't go in a timely fashion. This results in only 1-2 cars going. Frustrations mounts. People start to take risks and drive more stupidly than normal (which is hard to believe!).
If you have ever been to any American city, they all have equal turning lanes for all traffic lights. Everyone knows that they will get a turn and no one needs to run the light or take foolish risks to make a left turn. Everyone get the same amount of time, every time. Why the fuck can't Edmonton or Sherwood Park do that? Are they smarter than we are? Gawd I hope not. That would be almost impossible. But Americans know how to move traffic. Canadians are idiots when it comes to moving traffic. That is the only explanation that I can come up with.
Along with the traffic lights, there is a little problem I see with the pedestrian walk/don't walk signs in Edmonton. WTF is up with the countdown at the corner? The waking sign says don't walk, but they put a little count down on it. Now as a driver I can see this being helpful to me, as I can see when the light is really going to change. But as for the pedestrian, it's a do whatever you want until the countdown is over message. Cross walks seem like an easy thing. If you use either words or signs, you use walk or don't walk, or walk and a hand up to signal don't walk. What is difficult about that? If the hand is up, you don't walk. If is says walk ... you walk. That's not fucking hard at all. But when you put a countdown into the mix, you open it up for all the idiots, morons, criminals, illiterates and ingrates who don't want to follow the simple rules and laws of our society. If you don't follow the walk/don't walk it screws up traffic to no end. Cars turning right can't turn because people think that it is alright to enter the crosswalk when there is any number left on the countdown. Then they meander through the intersection stopping traffic.
Let me set the scenario: the crosswalk has a hand up telling the literate or intelligent not to walk. But... there is a countdown and here comes Kurt Cobain sauntering down the street. He sees the countdown still has number on it so he naturally enters the intersection. Why? Because he wants to! Now he goes into cool mode and starts to walk slowly. Could it be because the sideways baseball cap is too tight on his pea head, or maybe it is because his baggy-assed jeans are hanging so low that he is able to take only six inch strides with his 'skater' shoes? Might it be that he can only walk four step without checking his cell phone to get that important twitter message that his girl friend just boiled eggs all by her self? Who knows? Meanwhile the traffic; that had the right of way, is stopped waiting for Cobain to get through the intersection. The light changes and he still hasn't finished going through the crosswalk, making all traffic stopped. And I am sitting there wanted to hit someone with a baseball bat!
As I was driving today; through the snow and icy roads, my frustrations mounted when I was forced to sit at an intersection and not get to make a left turn. Who is God's name designed the traffic lights in the Edmonton and Sherwood Park? Are they complete idiots or what?
There is so many problems when making left turns I don't know where to begin. I guess I shall start with the facts that so few street lights have a left turning arrow or a turning lane. Some of them are designed with the spot available for the flashing light or arrow ... but they just don't use it. What the fuck is it there for if they don't use it? Some only use it a certain times of the day. Wonderful. Isn't that great? I can turn left at 3:30 in the afternoon but not at 10:30 in the morning. Oh, I am sure they will tell you that it is based on traffic flow. Bullshit. They decide and manipulate traffic flow for when they want you to turn. If they just had turning lights at all intersections, traffic would move much better.
The lights that have the turning arrows are not much less frustrating. Most Edmonton and Sherwood Park turning lights last 2-3 cars. Which means if you are the fourth car in line, you have to run the light or wait and hope you get through when the light isn't flashing. Now you have some moron at the front of the line doing whatever it is that morons do in the car when they are not paying attention and doesn't go in a timely fashion. This results in only 1-2 cars going. Frustrations mounts. People start to take risks and drive more stupidly than normal (which is hard to believe!).
If you have ever been to any American city, they all have equal turning lanes for all traffic lights. Everyone knows that they will get a turn and no one needs to run the light or take foolish risks to make a left turn. Everyone get the same amount of time, every time. Why the fuck can't Edmonton or Sherwood Park do that? Are they smarter than we are? Gawd I hope not. That would be almost impossible. But Americans know how to move traffic. Canadians are idiots when it comes to moving traffic. That is the only explanation that I can come up with.
Along with the traffic lights, there is a little problem I see with the pedestrian walk/don't walk signs in Edmonton. WTF is up with the countdown at the corner? The waking sign says don't walk, but they put a little count down on it. Now as a driver I can see this being helpful to me, as I can see when the light is really going to change. But as for the pedestrian, it's a do whatever you want until the countdown is over message. Cross walks seem like an easy thing. If you use either words or signs, you use walk or don't walk, or walk and a hand up to signal don't walk. What is difficult about that? If the hand is up, you don't walk. If is says walk ... you walk. That's not fucking hard at all. But when you put a countdown into the mix, you open it up for all the idiots, morons, criminals, illiterates and ingrates who don't want to follow the simple rules and laws of our society. If you don't follow the walk/don't walk it screws up traffic to no end. Cars turning right can't turn because people think that it is alright to enter the crosswalk when there is any number left on the countdown. Then they meander through the intersection stopping traffic.
Let me set the scenario: the crosswalk has a hand up telling the literate or intelligent not to walk. But... there is a countdown and here comes Kurt Cobain sauntering down the street. He sees the countdown still has number on it so he naturally enters the intersection. Why? Because he wants to! Now he goes into cool mode and starts to walk slowly. Could it be because the sideways baseball cap is too tight on his pea head, or maybe it is because his baggy-assed jeans are hanging so low that he is able to take only six inch strides with his 'skater' shoes? Might it be that he can only walk four step without checking his cell phone to get that important twitter message that his girl friend just boiled eggs all by her self? Who knows? Meanwhile the traffic; that had the right of way, is stopped waiting for Cobain to get through the intersection. The light changes and he still hasn't finished going through the crosswalk, making all traffic stopped. And I am sitting there wanted to hit someone with a baseball bat!
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Oh N-Oden!
I was saddened last night by the news that Greg Oden was injured again and would miss this entire season after having microfracture surgery on his left knee on Friday. This will be his second round with microfracture surgery, after having it on his right knee before his rookie year. In between he cracked his kneecap and then fractured his left patella missing most of last season. He had played his only year at 'THE Ohio State' (WFT is that about?) shooting with his left hand after breaking his right wrist before the season had begun. After being the number one draft choice in the 2007 NBA draft, Oden has played 82 total games, the equivalent on one full season.
Why the hell do I care? Well, because I am a sap for high draft choices. I always want them to succeed. I started following drafts when I was about 16 years old. I remember sitting in the locker room at my high school and listened to the news at lunch time concerning the NHL draft (They played the radio at lunch time). For some Gawd awful reason the Philadelphia Flyers drafted Rick McCleish ahead of Bobby Clarke and Reggie Leach. Who the hell was Rick McCleish? I had never heard of him and Clarke and Leach were two of the greatest junior hockey players ever produced in the Western Junior Hockey League. I was hooked. From then on I followed every draft that I could. NHL, NBA, MLB and NFL. I don't care, I love mock drafts. I love reading about the players to be drafted. I have a collection of most drafts back to about 1970 in most of the sports. I occasionally look at them, evaluate the outcomes and think about what ifs (yes I am that big of a loser!). I still try to remember the players drafted in order from specific drafts. It helps me to sleep at night. To hell with counting sheep!
The first overall draft choice is someone who is always a marked man in his sport. How that player produces is something that will spark conversation and debate for many, many years. Just look at the amount of talk that has gone on through the years since the Portland Trailblazers drafted Sam Bowie instead of Michael Jordan in 1984. I'm still talking about, well at least electronically.
Oden's injury plagued career will always look much, much worse because Kevin Durrant was drafted second that year and at the age of twenty-two he is, in my opinion, the best player in the league. He is in fact everything that LBJ is not: humble, hard-working, without an entourage, and willing to stay in the place he was drafted (I have never heard him say he was 'all about winning'). The Portland Trailblazer fans must throw up every time they look in the papers and see that Durrant went for another 35 points in a victory, while Oden hobbles off to surgery again.
Of coarse I wrote yesterday about a certain top overall pick in the NBA that I don't care to follow but usually I love to follow young players with great potential. When Steven Stauburg was injured this fall while pitching for the Washington Senators, I was particularly disappointed. He had proven that in his short MLB career that he was going to be special. Now... who knows if he will ever return from elbow surgery. Some do, some don't. I have even started to watch the Oilers after over twenty years of disinterest, due to the fact that they are loaded with young talent. Taylor Hall reminds me so much of a combination of Mark Messier and Glen Anderson. How his talent and abilities will develop and progress is anyone's guess. That is what is great about youth, talent and drafts: the unknown. Maybe Taylor Hall will lead the Oilers back to the promise land. Greg Oden was supposed to lead Portland to a championship. With both knees totally screwed, that seems very unlikely.
I read on espn.com when Greg Oden was drafted that when he walked across the room, he walked like an 80 year old man. He had none of the grace and athleticism that most NBA basketball players possess. The writer said Kevin Durrant floated across the room while Oden shuffled. Maybe Portland should have given him the walking test before they drafted him.
Oh well who's next? There is always someone...
Why the hell do I care? Well, because I am a sap for high draft choices. I always want them to succeed. I started following drafts when I was about 16 years old. I remember sitting in the locker room at my high school and listened to the news at lunch time concerning the NHL draft (They played the radio at lunch time). For some Gawd awful reason the Philadelphia Flyers drafted Rick McCleish ahead of Bobby Clarke and Reggie Leach. Who the hell was Rick McCleish? I had never heard of him and Clarke and Leach were two of the greatest junior hockey players ever produced in the Western Junior Hockey League. I was hooked. From then on I followed every draft that I could. NHL, NBA, MLB and NFL. I don't care, I love mock drafts. I love reading about the players to be drafted. I have a collection of most drafts back to about 1970 in most of the sports. I occasionally look at them, evaluate the outcomes and think about what ifs (yes I am that big of a loser!). I still try to remember the players drafted in order from specific drafts. It helps me to sleep at night. To hell with counting sheep!
The first overall draft choice is someone who is always a marked man in his sport. How that player produces is something that will spark conversation and debate for many, many years. Just look at the amount of talk that has gone on through the years since the Portland Trailblazers drafted Sam Bowie instead of Michael Jordan in 1984. I'm still talking about, well at least electronically.
Oden's injury plagued career will always look much, much worse because Kevin Durrant was drafted second that year and at the age of twenty-two he is, in my opinion, the best player in the league. He is in fact everything that LBJ is not: humble, hard-working, without an entourage, and willing to stay in the place he was drafted (I have never heard him say he was 'all about winning'). The Portland Trailblazer fans must throw up every time they look in the papers and see that Durrant went for another 35 points in a victory, while Oden hobbles off to surgery again.
Of coarse I wrote yesterday about a certain top overall pick in the NBA that I don't care to follow but usually I love to follow young players with great potential. When Steven Stauburg was injured this fall while pitching for the Washington Senators, I was particularly disappointed. He had proven that in his short MLB career that he was going to be special. Now... who knows if he will ever return from elbow surgery. Some do, some don't. I have even started to watch the Oilers after over twenty years of disinterest, due to the fact that they are loaded with young talent. Taylor Hall reminds me so much of a combination of Mark Messier and Glen Anderson. How his talent and abilities will develop and progress is anyone's guess. That is what is great about youth, talent and drafts: the unknown. Maybe Taylor Hall will lead the Oilers back to the promise land. Greg Oden was supposed to lead Portland to a championship. With both knees totally screwed, that seems very unlikely.
I read on espn.com when Greg Oden was drafted that when he walked across the room, he walked like an 80 year old man. He had none of the grace and athleticism that most NBA basketball players possess. The writer said Kevin Durrant floated across the room while Oden shuffled. Maybe Portland should have given him the walking test before they drafted him.
Oh well who's next? There is always someone...
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
"I'm All About Winning... REALLY?
I love the new favorite sports term for the 21st century. "You know me.. I'm all about winning". WTF does that mean? If I hear that one more time I will throw up all over my bubble. I don't remember Larry Bird, Magic Johnson, Michael Jordan, Tim Duncan, Bill Russell, Kevin McHale or a litany of other players who have actually earned multiple championships, utter those words. And the reason was because they were out practicing. Today's superficial superstars and divas love to talk the talk but they don't do anything substantial to win.
Thank God I was in Macedonia this summer; incommunicado, so I didn't have to put up with 'the decision'. I am sure that LBJ uttered those brilliant words somewhere along the way. My question is; if he is 'all about winning', why doesn't he spend a little more time working on a jump shot instead of traversing the world with his entourage, wearing his hat sideways, trying to become a global celebrity? If he was 'all about winning' why didn't he stick with the hand he was dealt and make them champions. Other than Magic Johnson, most of those players I have named started out with bad teams and turned them into NBA champions. What did LBJ do when things didn't work our for him? Well; first off, he folded the fucking tent last year in the playoffs. There's a great example of someone who's 'all about winning'. Could you ever imagine Michael Jordan folding the tent in a game, albeit February in Minnesota or in the NBA playoffs? He would have fucking killed someone before he would have done that. Maybe LBJ and his 'all about winning' motto was already working on that tremendously well choreographed TV special that he blessed us with. Perhaps working on that jumper a little more and the dancing a little less would bring that win that he's' all about!'
LBJ is easily the most gifted athlete to ever play the game. A physique like that come along once in a lifetime. He is a marvel. His all round basketball skills are fantastic. He can do everything except make a consistent jump shot. Have you watched him on the wing? I have never seen anyone run like that. Could you imagine him playing wide receiver or tight end in the NFL? However; he is the perfect example of the 21st century athlete. He has been a diva since he was a pre-teenager. He has been so gifted that everyone has kissed his ass and told him how great he is forever. He is all fluff and no substance. As of yet, despite all his admiral physical skills, he is without a ring. It took MJ six years to win a championship and the difference is that he stuck with his team and won. What did LBJ do? He runs away and tries to literally buy himself a championship. But he's 'all about winning'... right?
The other superstar that lights me up on this subject is Allan Iverson. Mr. Practice. Here was another incredibly physically talented player who just didn't get it. No one, and I mean no one who has ever played the game had the quickness of AI; and quickness is the single most important physical skill in basketball. If you look up the definition of blow by, there will be a picture of AI. He always claimed that he was 'all about winning'. Really? And how exactly can you claim that when you don't go to practice; or when you are there, you don't work hard? I will give him all the credit in the world for being a tough SOB on the court. He got knocked down a million times and he jumped up and played hard. But that doesn't make him 'all about winning'. If he really cared he would have spent a little time in the gym working on that crappy jump shot of his, or in the weight room instead of the tattoo parlor. Without practice, how exactly are you going to improve? How are you going to develop the cohesiveness and teamwork you need on defense? Or the camaraderie forged by the hard work of practice? I guess mister 'all about winning' thinks those traits of a winner will just fall out of the sky and hit him on his tattooed ass.
The 21st century athlete wants everything to go their way. Not only do they think that they are entitled to the obscene amounts of money they receive, but also that they are entitled to winning without paying the price of hard times.
LBJ: what do we want you to do? How about prove that you are a winner instead of telling us that you are 'all about winning'. That would be a good start.
P.S. Now that AI is 'all about winning'... in Turkey, maybe he can put in a good word for TFT and get him a job in the T.B.A.
Thank God I was in Macedonia this summer; incommunicado, so I didn't have to put up with 'the decision'. I am sure that LBJ uttered those brilliant words somewhere along the way. My question is; if he is 'all about winning', why doesn't he spend a little more time working on a jump shot instead of traversing the world with his entourage, wearing his hat sideways, trying to become a global celebrity? If he was 'all about winning' why didn't he stick with the hand he was dealt and make them champions. Other than Magic Johnson, most of those players I have named started out with bad teams and turned them into NBA champions. What did LBJ do when things didn't work our for him? Well; first off, he folded the fucking tent last year in the playoffs. There's a great example of someone who's 'all about winning'. Could you ever imagine Michael Jordan folding the tent in a game, albeit February in Minnesota or in the NBA playoffs? He would have fucking killed someone before he would have done that. Maybe LBJ and his 'all about winning' motto was already working on that tremendously well choreographed TV special that he blessed us with. Perhaps working on that jumper a little more and the dancing a little less would bring that win that he's' all about!'
LBJ is easily the most gifted athlete to ever play the game. A physique like that come along once in a lifetime. He is a marvel. His all round basketball skills are fantastic. He can do everything except make a consistent jump shot. Have you watched him on the wing? I have never seen anyone run like that. Could you imagine him playing wide receiver or tight end in the NFL? However; he is the perfect example of the 21st century athlete. He has been a diva since he was a pre-teenager. He has been so gifted that everyone has kissed his ass and told him how great he is forever. He is all fluff and no substance. As of yet, despite all his admiral physical skills, he is without a ring. It took MJ six years to win a championship and the difference is that he stuck with his team and won. What did LBJ do? He runs away and tries to literally buy himself a championship. But he's 'all about winning'... right?
The other superstar that lights me up on this subject is Allan Iverson. Mr. Practice. Here was another incredibly physically talented player who just didn't get it. No one, and I mean no one who has ever played the game had the quickness of AI; and quickness is the single most important physical skill in basketball. If you look up the definition of blow by, there will be a picture of AI. He always claimed that he was 'all about winning'. Really? And how exactly can you claim that when you don't go to practice; or when you are there, you don't work hard? I will give him all the credit in the world for being a tough SOB on the court. He got knocked down a million times and he jumped up and played hard. But that doesn't make him 'all about winning'. If he really cared he would have spent a little time in the gym working on that crappy jump shot of his, or in the weight room instead of the tattoo parlor. Without practice, how exactly are you going to improve? How are you going to develop the cohesiveness and teamwork you need on defense? Or the camaraderie forged by the hard work of practice? I guess mister 'all about winning' thinks those traits of a winner will just fall out of the sky and hit him on his tattooed ass.
The 21st century athlete wants everything to go their way. Not only do they think that they are entitled to the obscene amounts of money they receive, but also that they are entitled to winning without paying the price of hard times.
LBJ: what do we want you to do? How about prove that you are a winner instead of telling us that you are 'all about winning'. That would be a good start.
P.S. Now that AI is 'all about winning'... in Turkey, maybe he can put in a good word for TFT and get him a job in the T.B.A.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Turkoglu
Who exactly told Hedo Turkoglu that he is a great player, because his every movement gives you the impression that he thinks he is great?
I am watching the Phoenix/Denver game tonight and my wife asked me if that is really his name. I asked her what she was talking about and she said that I always call him "That Fucking Turkoglu" (Known as TFT, from now on). She is right; I always call him that because he fucks everything up.
I talk to myself. When you live in a bubble, who else is there to talk to? My wife doesn't like sports, so when I watch games on T.V. I vocalize my thoughts. My dear wife has heard me call him that name many, many times. We used to get pretty much every Raptor game last year and he was horrible. He came from Orlando thinking that he was going to be the star of the Raptors and lead them to glory. What a joke.
Now I will admit that he has some nice offensive skills; such as handling the ball, passing and occasionally he gets in a streak from behind the arc. Like a former assistant coach of mine (in name only!) used to say about one of our players, "She a great shooter; when she's hot, she never misses." Duh. Isn't everyone a great shooter when they are hot? The problem is that she was only hot two games out of ten. That's TFT. He is occasionally hot and he thinks he is a great shooter, so he shoots all the time. Shall we should explore why he is open and gets a lot of looks from behind the arc? Could it be because the other teams let him shoot? Dean Smith had a tall stiff from Germany named Zwikker who took an ill advised shot. When coach Smith mentioned that it wasn't a very good shot, Serge said "But coach, I was wide open." Coach Smith replied that maybe while he sat on the bench he should consider why the other team left him wide open. By the way, I did not know that tuna came from Germany, but Zwikker proves that it does.
The most success TFT had was when he was surrounded by star players that the other team had to guard, leaving TFT wide open most of the time. Wouldn't you rather have TFT shoot 3's as opposed to Dwight Howard dunking every shot? Or perhaps teams would rather have TFT shoot scud missiles from outside rather than let Chris Weber or Vlad Divac score from two feet. Yes he made the occasional big shot but let's not confuse him with great money players in the NBA. Remember the old saying, "You throw enough shit enough against the wall, some of it will stick." TFT puts up a lot of shit!
Despite some offensive skills, he has so many holes in his game it is not funny. Have you watched him try to play defense? Last year the Raptors had no chance when the games were close. Every team would simply get TFT's man to run screen roll and it was either a basket, a foul or both. You put TFT with Calderon and it was laughable. Calderon, the Prince look-alike, can't guard a fucking fence post and he is ten times the defender TFT is. When the other team ran screen roll against TFT and Calderon, it was kiddies day at the fair. Then TFT would come down and try to be the hero and win the game by over-handling the ball and shooting a shot that had absolutely no chance of going in. Granted not every player wants to take those last second, game on the line shots, but just because you want to take the shot doesn't mean that you should.
TFT had a lot of nerve to whine his way out of Toronto, as if it was an organization problem that made him bad. No, no, no. You are bad Turkoglu. Now you are bringing down Phoenix. I hope your next team is the Istanbul Invaders of the T. B. A.
I am watching the Phoenix/Denver game tonight and my wife asked me if that is really his name. I asked her what she was talking about and she said that I always call him "That Fucking Turkoglu" (Known as TFT, from now on). She is right; I always call him that because he fucks everything up.
I talk to myself. When you live in a bubble, who else is there to talk to? My wife doesn't like sports, so when I watch games on T.V. I vocalize my thoughts. My dear wife has heard me call him that name many, many times. We used to get pretty much every Raptor game last year and he was horrible. He came from Orlando thinking that he was going to be the star of the Raptors and lead them to glory. What a joke.
Now I will admit that he has some nice offensive skills; such as handling the ball, passing and occasionally he gets in a streak from behind the arc. Like a former assistant coach of mine (in name only!) used to say about one of our players, "She a great shooter; when she's hot, she never misses." Duh. Isn't everyone a great shooter when they are hot? The problem is that she was only hot two games out of ten. That's TFT. He is occasionally hot and he thinks he is a great shooter, so he shoots all the time. Shall we should explore why he is open and gets a lot of looks from behind the arc? Could it be because the other teams let him shoot? Dean Smith had a tall stiff from Germany named Zwikker who took an ill advised shot. When coach Smith mentioned that it wasn't a very good shot, Serge said "But coach, I was wide open." Coach Smith replied that maybe while he sat on the bench he should consider why the other team left him wide open. By the way, I did not know that tuna came from Germany, but Zwikker proves that it does.
The most success TFT had was when he was surrounded by star players that the other team had to guard, leaving TFT wide open most of the time. Wouldn't you rather have TFT shoot 3's as opposed to Dwight Howard dunking every shot? Or perhaps teams would rather have TFT shoot scud missiles from outside rather than let Chris Weber or Vlad Divac score from two feet. Yes he made the occasional big shot but let's not confuse him with great money players in the NBA. Remember the old saying, "You throw enough shit enough against the wall, some of it will stick." TFT puts up a lot of shit!
Despite some offensive skills, he has so many holes in his game it is not funny. Have you watched him try to play defense? Last year the Raptors had no chance when the games were close. Every team would simply get TFT's man to run screen roll and it was either a basket, a foul or both. You put TFT with Calderon and it was laughable. Calderon, the Prince look-alike, can't guard a fucking fence post and he is ten times the defender TFT is. When the other team ran screen roll against TFT and Calderon, it was kiddies day at the fair. Then TFT would come down and try to be the hero and win the game by over-handling the ball and shooting a shot that had absolutely no chance of going in. Granted not every player wants to take those last second, game on the line shots, but just because you want to take the shot doesn't mean that you should.
TFT had a lot of nerve to whine his way out of Toronto, as if it was an organization problem that made him bad. No, no, no. You are bad Turkoglu. Now you are bringing down Phoenix. I hope your next team is the Istanbul Invaders of the T. B. A.
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