I can remember the exact moment that I became a North Carolina Tar Heel fan. When I laid my eyes on the March 17, 1975 issue of Sports Illustrated, I became smitten. The cover had Phil Ford dribbling up the court. On the front it said 'Freshman Phil Ford Kicks Up His Tar Heels'. The color of the Tar Heel's uniform did it for me. Since then I have had a tortured love affair with the Heels; a love affair that often places me on the verge (the bridge).
My heart has been broken so many time that I can not begin to tell you. I am listening to their game right now and they are going to lose to a very average Vanderbilt team. With eight high school all-Americans on their team they are losing to a bunch of guys from Africa and Australia. How does that happen? UNC is doing it to me again.
Last year, Carolina had the worst year in memory. They lost 20 games and were so badly outplayed that even Duke felt sorry for them. After winning the national championship in 2009, they were obviously going to be a different team due to graduation and early departures; however, they sucked so badly that it was often embarrassing. Granted, the expectations were way, way off last year; but, with that much talent, they simply had to produce much more than what they did.
This year's team again is again highly rated, as they got rid of some dead weight and added three more high school AAs. Well, the same old shit is causing the problems. Turnovers, lousy shooting, turnovers, poor perimeter defense, turnovers, a lack of post depth, turnovers, no senior leadership, turnovers and generally lackadaisical play, as well as turnovers, puts their record at 2-2, after getting their asses handed to them twice in Puerto Rico.
I have spent the last hour trying to convince myself that they are not that good and not to get my hopes up this year. I can tell myself all the stories I want, but in the end it kills me that they suck. This is North Carolina. This is a program with a tradition of exemplary play that stretches back to 1967. Coach Dean Smith build the Tar Heel dynasty, and I call it a dynasty because despite winning 'only' four NCAA championships in the past 43 years, UNC has spent almost every year ranked among the top five teams. In almost every season the Tar Heels not only were a dominant factor in the very difficult ACC conference, but they had a real, honest chance to get to the Final Four and win it all. In the 35 years that I have followed Carolina, I can only remember 6 seasons in which the Heels were not a threat to win it all; and two of those years were during the Matt Doherty debacle years (not a real coach!).
Some of the losses still hurt to this day. Beaten in the finals in 77 and 81 were killers. Jordan losing in 83 and 84 was devastating. Five times they lost to the eventual champions, which was of no consolation at all to my sorrow. Fucking Boeheim (Ichabod Crane) and Syracuse in 87 hurt like a kick to the balls and then losing to that old bastard Lute Olsen again the next year ( Lute? WTF kind of name is that?). Reaching the final four in 91, 95, 97, 98, 2000 and 2008 and losing to teams they should have beaten, hurt beyond belief. Georgetown coming back from 15 down with ten minutes left and beating them in OT in 07 was shocking to say the least. Need I go on... and on... and on? George Mason in 06. GEORGE MASON for fuck sakes! You want more? The horror ... the horror...
My last bottom-out day was during the 2009 championship season. They were a dominant team that somehow managed to lose to Maryland in February. The Terps were an ok team, and should not had beaten the eventual NCAA champions. I had had it. I swore that this was the end. I was going to get myself another team. I called the only person who could possibly understand: a former assistant coach (this one really was an assistant coach, not a wanna be) who now is a head coach. I now assist him by being his psychoanalyst and regularly get him off the bridge, so I knew he would be able to help me in my time of need. As I babbled on and on about those gutless, choking, losers; or something to that extent, he asked me a very important questions. If I was to jump ship; whom would I then cheer for? He started throwing out names: Louisville (his favorite)? U Conn? Texas? Dook? Michigan State? Villanova? UCLA? Kentucky? Kansas.? Hmmm? Good question. Let me see...
Louisville? With that weasel Pittno? Would you but a car from him, or go to an Italian restaurant? U Conn? Not with Calhoon the miserable old bastard. Texas? Fucking Barnes tried to pick a fight with Dean Smith one time. Who doesn't love Dean Smith? Dook? Dook? With Rat-face? Those Yuppie sombitches? Absolutely not! Michigan State? Perhaps, I like Tom Izzo. But they always play a little rough for my liking. A bunch of thugs. Villanova? Pretty boy Jay Wright and Philadelphia? Not bloody likely. UCLA? Ya when John Wooden comes back from the grave to coach them. Kentucky? Calipari, that cheating bastard? How is it that the NCAA find something dirty with his programs just after he has left town? Kentucky, you're next, mark my words. Kansas? Na.
So there you are: I am stuck with Carolina. The love affair continues. They will kill me slowly but surely. There is no other choice. I hate everyone else.
Always remember, 'Once you've said Carolina, you've said it all', and 'If God did not love UNC, why is the sky Carolina blue?'
Go Tar Heels!!
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