NBA Officials - Bad Joke

NBA refs are a joke.  That is the only word for it.  They are just plain bad.  They can make all the excuses they want about how big and strong NBA players are and how difficult it is to officiate them, but the fact remains: they are a joke.
Each and every game that you watch, you see incompetence so many times that it is not funny.  I have reffed before.  I know it is difficult.  The game of basketball is fast, the action is continuous and you have to not only be aware of what the rules are but you must have a feel for the game, which comes with an understanding of what is happening in a lightening fast manner. But these sons of bitches are supposedly the best in the world.  They work with the best players in the world. Instead they are fucking clowns.
 NBA officials seem to have predetermined ideas of what is going to happen and make the call whether or not it really happens that way or not.  Officials are instructed over and over again not to anticipate something happening.  Hustle to get into the best position and call what you SEE, not what you think is going to happen.  NBA officials might as well close their eyes and just call a foul on the lesser of the two stars that are involved.  They could be sitting on the sidelines, having nachos ad beer and make most of the calls involved.  They decide what is going to happen, and just make stupid call, after stupid call.  I am amazed that someone in the NBA hasn't punched some refs lights out.  The frustration just watching these fucking guys is hard to take, let alone if you playing hard and getting screwed because the person you are guarding is a bigger star than you.
And the arrogance.  Take someone like Joey Crawford.  How he has lived to the age he is, without getting killed by a seven foot adonis, is beyond me.  The NBA recently had a big scandal when one of there officials was caught fixing games for his financial benefit, but the fucking refs determine the outcomes of almost each and every game.  Their predetermining who and who isn't going to get calls, and that decide games every night.  The best players get the calls.  The young players don't get the calls and get the fouls called against them.  If the play involved others than a superstar, the best player gets the call.  How fucking frustrating is that?  I watch time and time again a young player getting screwed defensively by calls made automatically against them, even when they are not really occurring.
How many times, at crucial times of the game and a foul is called that might foul out a star player; suddenly have the foul called on a lesser important player who happened to be standing nearby, usually doing nothing?  That's and oldie but a goody of the NBA refs.  'Fans want to see the stars', say the paid announcers.  Well isn't that fucking wonderful?  Coaches and players work their assess off to beat teams with superstars and then when they have succeeded in getting the star to foul out, he is rescued by the incompetent official.  How is that either fair or correct?
Make up calls are another NBA official's favorite things.  I fucked up down there, so not I will fuck up here to even it out.  Isn't that great?  Just what players and coaches want: consistency.  Everyone knows the refs do it but they just arrogantly run down the floor with at smug, shit-eating look on their faces and keep going like nothing has happened.  It is fucking infuriating.
As most of you know, I have some issue with basketball officials.  Always have, always will have.  Coaches and players work very hard to play at a certain level, always striving for the perfect game. And then all of your hard work and effort can be pissed away with the single  act of some fucking incompetent,  moron blowing his whistle and making a horrible game altering call.  NBA games involve millions and millions of dollars, both in gambling and the high priced players and coaches involved.  The quality of the officiating should reflect the important part that the refs play in each and every game. Instead you have bumbling idiots making up call after call so that the stars can be stars and the game's outcome is determined by the three stooges with whistles.
 NBA refs should be the best of the best.  Better than NCAA referees.  Better than international referees.  Better than anyone.  There is no fucking way that the NBA officials are the best.  Dick Fucking Bavetta is about a thousand years old and he still regularly working in the NBA.  How can a 73 year old man officiate a game in which LaBron James is running up and down the court?  And he still does playoff games.  That is a joke.  Just like the rest.
To show you how deeply I believe in that I say about basketball officials, MDW has ok'ed me putting the following on my tombstone:
"I told you those refs were killing me"!

Have a Holly, Jolly Christmas

Oh, the Wisdom

You may not know this about the AB but I have a little problem with traffic.  This may come as a surprise to you that such a calm, serene person such as myself could get himself worked up about something so inconsequential as driving in a car, merrily down the road. Sherwood Park is a particular focal point. If you have read some of my early posts, I have a 'FEW ISSUES' with the traffic/driving situation that exists in our fair Hamlet.
A couple of new situations have arisen the past weeks (in Strathcona County, or as I call it; the County of Strathcona - why exactly did that change?) that have sent me into a new state of frustration and bewilderment concerning the level of stupidity that seems to come out of whatever planning and; I guess careful thought, about how to make this County's roads move traffic more smoothly.
The first things that drives me crazy is the putting of traffic lights, two miles south of Walmart.  Granted, it was needed, but it was needed ten years ago.  Why now?  The traffic at that corner is in a word, dangerous.  To cross the Whitemud, involves you literally taking your life in your hands.  The traffic from both the east and west is steady.  MDW and I decided long, long ago that we would not risk our lives crossing there, choosing to travel one or two miles east to cross.  Imagine all the miles, gas,  and time that has been wasted.  Now they make lights.  Not only are there lights at this corner, but they widened the intersection to allow cars to stop and then merge.  Holy Fuck!   If you have driven in the past ten years you will know that NO ONE knows how to merge.  It is a case of everyone bullying people out of their way, so they can go where they want.  Now we have a corner with a light and a merge lane after the turn.  I have already seen dozen of times in which people pull up, stop, wait, wait, wait, and when the light turns green, turn right.  It was much faster before, when there was no light, because people were not confused by the situation.  Let us not forget that most people driving are fucking morons, who can not look at a situation and correctly do the suitable manoeuvre that is required.  THEY ARE TOO STUPID!  So they have put lights to increase traffic flow and it works exactly the opposite.  Fucking brilliant.
Now the light is fine.  It certainly isn't fair and equitable, but you do get a chance. albeit slim.  In the mornings, the light last, and I have timed it; 4 seconds.  But is is an improvement.  In the afternoon, it is 7 seconds.  This I can't complain about, because we get a chance.
Yesterday, as I drove MDW to her last Christmas concert, a new sign has been put up, citing a change of speed on the road going south towards the Whitemud.  The new speed limit is 60 km, down from 70 km.  I have long wondered why this road is 70 km, when all the other roads in the county, including roads closest to this road remain 80 km.  There are no more roads leading into sub divisions on this road, than others.  In fact this road has several turning lanes created.  So why the fuck was this road 70 km and others remaining 80 km?  Now, half way to the Whitemud, they have lowered it again to 60 km.  Why?  For what fucking reason did they do this?  They will answer "Oh, cars have to slow down for the lights". Really?  What the fuck did they do before, when it was a stop sign?  How has a light made any difference to the speed.  When there was a stop sign, YOU HAD TO STOP.  Now, you don't have to stop, in fact you may just breeze right on through or turn.  It makes no sense to lower the speed limit.  Someone please explain this to me.
Another raging case of stupidity occurs at the soon to be defunct Colchester School.  The road travelling west to the school has always been 80 km.  They have put two new speed limits within fifty metres of each other.  You travel west at 80 km and suddenly the limit goes to 60 km and then twenty metres later it drops to 50 km.  WTF?  I don't know how you are supposed to achieve those speeds within the distances they put it up.  So why the fuck do it?  It is ridiculous.  Who is the fucking rocket scientist that decided to do this.  These signs are on the north side of the road and the signs on the south side have be mowed over by the snow removal operators, so I guess I could drive as fast as I want on that side of the road.
Ahhhhhh! And and Larry Bird once said on Christmas Day to the Atlanta Hawks bench as he ran by on his way to scoring  60 on them, ; "Merry Fucking Christmas"

 

BOOMTOWN RATS - I DON'T LIKE MONDAYS 
The silicon chip inside her head
Gets switched to overload
And nobody’s gonna go to school today
She’s gonna make them stay at home
And daddy doesn’t understand it
He always said she was good as gold
And he can see no reasons
'Cos there are no reasons
What reason do you need to be show-ow-ow-ow-own?

I don’t like Mondays
Tell me why
I don’t like Mondays
Tell me why
I don’t like Mondays
I wanna shoo-oo-woo-woo-woo-oot the whole day down

 Most of the people who read this bunch of crap that I spew out are either teachers or people who have spend time working in the education world, particularly is schools. Schools much like the one in New Town Connecticut, that was attacked and savaged yesterday.  We have all spent time in discussions of what to do, how to do it and most everyone thinking that this endeavour was a complete and utter waste of time and energy, because; surely it will never happen... 
If you think about it, a school is a perfect storm for a situation such as this.  No matter how you plan, communicate with parents and employ other safeguards; there is virtually no way to stop what happened yesterday from happing nearly anywhere. How do you stop someone from entering a public venue, particularly when most schools promote and ensure that everything about the school is an open environment?  Parents are encouraged to coooooooooome on in. The school systems demands that our hallways, classrooms and playgrounds be assessable to any parent that wants to 'just see what is going on'. How in God's name can this situation be a safe environment?  
And who has to take the brunt of the stress that goes along with the supervision/guarding of this impossible situation?  The teachers.  The teacher must grow eyes in the back of their heads, know every bloody family situation (even when not informed), who every person is that wanders around the hallways or sticks their head in your classroom.  It is an impossible situation.  Schools lock most of their doors, but not all.  That doesn't include times in which kids leave doors open or put a boot in the door because they think their friend is outside and needs to get in. Parents come and go, in any door they want, often not closing doors properly.  Kids come and go through doors and don't take care to close them.  Getting into a school is the easiest thing in the world.  The road to hell is paved with good intentions, but shit happens.
Everyone is going to ask why.  Why? Why? Why?  The media machine instantly goes into motion.  CNN was/is a flurry of continuous loops, repeating time and time again the few snippets of information available.  No one will every know what lead this obviously doubled young person to do the unspeakable damage that was done.  The great debate concerning gun control and the availability of purchasing weapons such as were used yesterday, will rage on and on.  God bless that second amendment so near and dear to the American heart.  But let's not forget: gun don't kill, people kill.  Ya, right...
It is not every day that you see the United States President cry.  I am not sure Mitt Romney would have been quite as emotional about this situation, but that is another story.  The obvious pain and disbelief that  this tragedy has produced is hard to comprehend.  Why indeed?  This could happen anywhere, but the fact remains that these type of senseless tragedies occur in the United States of America more that twice as often as any other country.  
So here's the deal USA.  Instead of puffing yourself up again today and continue to spew out the same rhetoric that always comes in these tragic times about how great you are and how great you will be when you overcome yet another disaster, (oh and let's not forget the 'only in America' bullshit),  for once look at your self as you really are: a bullying, self-centered, socially rotting, war-mongering, evil empire that brings their problems upon themselves.  I know that this will never happen.  The American bullshit machine will not allow honest self reflection.  America loves a story and any tragedy that can be manipulated into a 'how great we are' episode will be be worked for all it's worth and in the end the brainless, average American will get that glassy-eyed look on their face and march towards the Kool-aid and drink for all they are worth.  Convinced that they have 'overcome' these tragedies and are better for it because their government tells them how great America is and they wouldn't lie... would they?
I have spent most of my life as an elementary teacher, educating kids the same age as those that were lost yesterday.  Other shootings situations involved older kids, mostly high school and college aged and although these tragedies were devastating, yesterday involved little kids.  Mere babies.  An incomprehensible crime towards humanity.  At least three guns, one being a semi-automatic assault rifle were used.  By a twenty year old 'kid'.  If that doesn't make a nation stand up and reflect upon its serious social problems, nothing will.  

Ticking Elton John

"You've slept too long in silence" Mama said
Remember Mama said
Ticking, ticking
"Crazy boy, you'll only wind up with strange notions in your head"
Hear it, hear it, ticking, ticking

Hockey Night in...?

Don Mclean once sang about the day that the music died, alluding to the death of Buddy Holly as the day in which  music 'changed' forever, not for the better.  I look at August 9, 1988 (our wedding anniversary no less...) as the day that hockey died.  Since that day, for me, hockey has spiralled into a black hole of apathy.  I have a really hard time caring about hockey any more.
Now that is not to say that I don't follow hockey.  I still faithfully read each and every box score on a daily basis.  In fact I read all box scores for every junior hockey game in Canada, as well as some American Hockey League games.  That will never change for me.  I love to look and see who has scored, when it occurred, how many shots there was on net, who got penalties, were there fights in the game and other stupid little facts that only a number geek like me would care about or even look at. I learned to read as a five year old, by pouring over the sports pages and in particular, the pages that had boxscores.
But since 'that day' I can honestly say that I have only watched perhaps 2-3 complete NHL hockey games.  To sit and watch a whole game is painful. The game has changed so much since the eighties, and again, not for the better.  But while saying that, I really miss having no hockey.  It is a travesty that this situation has gotten to where it is.
You have a situation in which a 3.3 billion dollar industry has shut down, with no winner in sight. The players will lose, the owners will lose and most importantly the fans will lose.  How can these idiots not have enough common sense to see that they have a golden goose, and they are fucking it up?.  They play a fucking GAME.  A GAME.  They are not solving crime, or curing cancer, or solving financial and economic troubles though out the world.  They play a fucking hockey game.  They make money playing a game.  They should get down on their hands and knees and thank God for their incredible fortune (no pun intended) of being able to earn an incredible living playing a fucking GAME.  The owners should be right beside them, thankful that they make an obscene amounts of money on the fact that mindless drones continue to flock to their municipally financed arenas, to watch a GAME.
This is the third or fourth time that the union and the owners have gone to war over labor negotiations (who can keep count?).  Now they are on the verge of the second nuclear winter, without hockey being played.  Who is the constant in all of this?  Your friend and mine... Gary 'Pocket Pool Playing' Bettman.  Have you ever seen that little fucker without his hands in his pockets?  Hmmmmm...?
All major sports have commissioners who are less than loved.  Selig is not loved.  Stern is not loved.  Goodall is not loved.  But Bettman is at a whole different level of hate.  He can not go into any arena in the world without getting his ass booed mercilessly.  It is fucking embarrassing.  I hate Bettman and I am embarrassed for him.  He either has the thickest skin in the world or is too stupid to know how much he is hated.  Bettman stands there with that smirking, shit-eating grin pasted to his weasely face, oblivious to the severity of the venom being spewed upon him.  Maybe he just sings to himself and pretends that they are saying Boo-tman (kind of like Monty Boo-urns in Simpsons).  Bettman is on the verge of not only being the only commissioner in sports history to lose one whole season, but now cancelling a second season.  What a fucking legacy.
And the process.  WTF?  It is December 14 and basically nothing has been done.  They have had years and years to start, work on, and finish this deal, and two months after the season should have started, they are basically at first base.  WTF have they been doing?  Ohhhh, right.  N-E-G-O-T-I-A-T-I-N-G.  Kind of like Castanza negotiates.  The clock is ticking and they are doing nothing.  I really laughed last week when some rocket scientist decided have negotiations with just a few owners and a few players. No trained, professional negotiators allowed in the meeting.  Talk about putting the lambs in with the wolves.  Let's look at the dynamics of these two groups.  On one hand you have the owners.  Rich powerful men who mostly got rich running over less rich, people.  They have gotten rich mainly thought their business acumen.  They have had to plan, organize, oversee, negotiate and create fortunes.  One would conclude that they are reasonably intelligent, with business skills.  After all they are fucking million/billionaires.  On the other hand you have a hockey player.  Educated is not the first thing you think about when you envision a hockey player.  A high percentage of the players in the NHL have not gotten a great education.  Now that may not ensure or determine their intelligence,  but it doesn't help.  They grew up riding busses from Swift Current to Regina and I think it is safe to say they don't spend their time on the bus pouring over economic or financial journals.
So now they are going to put a wolf in with a lamb (an uneducated lamb, at that) and they are going to solve this complicated, many sided, complex labor negotiation.  Are you fucking kidding me?  How could that work?  Zero chance.  In fact a zero chance is so far down the fucking road, that you couldn't see it with the Hubble Telescope. Surprise, surprise it failed.
The owners are no walk in the park in this negotiation.  They won the last labor battle with a fucking TKO in the first ten seconds of the fight.  They crushed the union.  They kicked the union's ass.  And yet, seven years down the road, they still fucked it up.  The owners can't help themselves.  They put things in place to save the game, and then they fuck it up.  The players don't go to the owners and hold a gun to their heads to pay them an obscene amount of money.  The owners signed a salary cap and instantly began finding every way possible to circumvent the very rules THEY put in.  They won the last union negotiation in every way possible and now they say the last labor deal is killing them.  They made the rules and now the rules are killing them.  Huh?
So now the owners are going to piss away another season to 'win' this labor fight.  Many are losing less money not playing, than if they were playing.  They basically don't care if there is hockey this year.  They players want to win this time after the ass-kicking they took last time.  Players are competitive and do not like ass-kickings.  It is their nature.  That is why they are professional athletes.  So here we sit with our thumbs firmly stuck up our rear ends, waiting for these two fucking idiot groups to solve a problem that seems to be solvable through a little common sense.
I haven't even touched on Donald Fehr, who like his name, sends fear and loathing to the deepest part of each and every owner's soul.  They hate him and want nothing to do with him.  Which is funny as hell.
I could go on and on but what is the use?  These morons will or will not solve this trivial problem.  Perhaps there will be hockey or not.  Who knows?  The sad things is that the only control that the true hockey fan has over this situation is in the buying of tickets.  Fans have the choice to buy tickets.  However; we know from past experience that the hockey fan WILL FLOCK TO THE GAMES, as soon as the labor situation is over.  You know they will.  Hockey fans are put in a tough situation.  To make a point, they could tell the team to fuck themselves and get their money back, cancelling they season tickets.  By doing that, they run the risk that they will never get another opportunity to see an NHL hockey game in person ever again.  Others will snap up the season tickets and they will be fucked.  Most fans will not risk that situation, so they will continue paying their obscene prices, just to see hockey.  They won't, not go to the games, to make a point because, after all; they have paid for the seats, so why not go.  It is no win situation for the fan.  They have waited and waited for 'the game' and now they are held hostage to pay big bucks for watered down talent, just to be able to see hockey; something they love with all their hearts.  Talk about a kick to the gun-ions.

Where Do I Begin...?

Nothing like winter to bring out the AB in me.  As usual my only excuse for not posting more is plain and simple laziness.  I should apologize for this but... meh!
Winter driving is the main ingredient to a putrid stew of social, educational, moral, petty problems that the AB cannot 'just let go'.  Where the fuck do I begin?
Let's kick it off with a minor little thing that is really an improvement, but a major kick in the gun-ions.  As most of you know, I'm MDW's ride.  I drive her most everywhere, and during the winter it is... everywhere.  This includes taking and picking her up from school on a daily basis.  She has taught at the same school for the past twenty-four years and to get there we need to cross the Whitemud freeway, south of Wal Mart.  This crossing is dangerous, infuriating and frustrating.  Many, many years ago, I told MDW that I will not ever go that way again until they have a light.  For about the past ten years, we have driven east to the Christian Academy, then south, crossing a less dangerous spot of the Whitemud, continue east, then back west to MDW's school.  We drove about an extra ten miles per day for ten years, as well as turning a twenty minute drive into a thirty to forty minute adventure.
Now, twenty days before MDW retires and we never, ever have to drive that stupid fucking route again; they put lights at the Whitemud, south of Whitemud.  Twenty fucking days!  Twenty fucking days!  Now they do it.  They are closing down MDW's school, meaning there will be less traffic heading south.  There is a shitty little gravel road near their school so very little traffic uses it to go west on what used to be twenty-third avenue.  So why the fuck now?  "Ohhhh, the traffic needs to be able to merge onto Whitemud", they will say.  Really? Now?  What exactly has changed that they need to have a merging, traffic light area now, that they did not need for the past ten fucking years.
Those fucking guys....
LK sent me an email about an article in the Sherwood Park News concerning an editorial written about the traffic concerns in our fair hamlet.  The editorial was bang on with the minimal space that the writer had in which to vent his frustration and questions.  Unfortunately this guy only touched on a few of the plethora of problems concerning the driving in SP.  I am convinced the AB could have written an entire fucking edition of the SPN about how ridiculous the driving situation is in SP.  I would like to tell this writer that it was a great opening paragraph, but please finish the book.
What drove me crazy was the moron, who in the next week's paper, defended the drivers of SP.  Are you fucking kidding me?  WTF is this guy looking at?  My only thought is that if you think things are ok driving in SP, then you most certainly are one of the fucking problems.  You are too stupid to live.  This idiot is one of the entitled, bullying, assholes of SP yuppies, that drive with zero consideration, thought or understanding of the complexities and subtleties of driving.  Please refer to my many, many posts concerning driving to refresh yourself on the litany of problems on the roads.  Here are a couple of new observations:
1) hoodie driving - It is safe to say that no one over the age of 35 would dare drive wearing a hoodie.  Not only does it look like you are fucking serial killer, but it completely and utterly blocks off all peripheral vision.  How the fuck can you drive safely when you cannot see anything that is going on around you? This is however, a social trait of the self-esteem generation, who only think about themselves and fuck everyone else.  What happens over there, doesn't matter.  Only where I am going, matters.  Not being able to see things around them doesn't matter when all you think about is where you are going and what  you want to do.  Self centred, entitled drivers, is what they are. But it is ok... cuz they look cool and that is the most important thing.
2) I have determined by considerable observation that young women (under forty) are the worst drivers on the road.  They drive like maniacs.  They social network more than anyone else, forever checking their phones, texting, talking, e-mailing and such.  And their speed is excessive to say the least.  They are scary.  But again it is ok because they look so great wearing their 'I am one of the people' - Mao hats.  Yummy mommies are dangerous drivers and should be banned from the roads.  I don't think this is too harsh, do you?
Enough about driving.  Doesn't SP do a great job cleaning roads?  We are so lucky (ha ha) to live on a bus route (actually a bus shortcut to the main bus terminal because they don't really ever stop and pick anyone up) so they do clean our street occasionally.  Of course having these busses piss me off for various reasons including that they drive close to the sidewalk, and because of no consistent snow clearing, my impeccably cleaned front sidewalk get covered with snow, squirted onto them by the bus' huge fucking wheels.  Nothing I like better than sweeping my sidewalk and an hour later, having to do it again.  Over and over.  I understand that I have nothing to do, but repeatedly sweeping my sidewalk is infuriating.  Thank you County for using my tax money to make our fair hamlet such a pleasure to inhabit.
Well as usual I tend to go off in many different directions, without a consistent theme.  So many complaints pop into my piddly little mind and I have trouble staying on track.  I will try very hard to be more vigilant in posting in a consistent manner.  I can feel then old venom building up and need an outlet.  No hockey, fucking stupid NBA players and refs, idiot athletes, the self-esteem generation and much, much more.  There is no end to frustration in this world.  All I have to do is get off my ass and write about it.

Fat Man Returns.. Channeling Through the A.B.

     Summer is upon us and the 'Fat Man' and MDW have decided to try out a few new places to dine and with that in mind, comes the reincarnation of the 'Fat Man's Review'.  We have gone to a couple of new places recently; an Italian place (of which I will review later), and the first of our summer plan to hit the different 'food trucks' for lunch in Edmonton: Bubba's BBQ.

     Bubba's is a pretty well known BBQ spot in Edmonton, having been around for several years.  The problem has been for Bubba to maintain one spot for a considerable amount of time.  He parked his 'mobile restaurant' on the south side for quite a while, but when the parking lot was sold along with the building, Bubba's had to relocate.  He has moved to a spot on Gateway Boulevard, directly south of Superstore, on the East side of the road.  Parking is limited and generally the quality of customers, judging by their parking skills, is of limited intelligence.  The place is open for business from 11:30 - 2:00, however people start lining up early and service is quite slow, so don't drag your feet getting there.  Bubba's also closes when they run out of the food for the day, so… chop, chop. 

     Bubba's is a one man operation.  I'll just call him Bubba (not his name), because Bubba is just such a fun, stupid name to say.  Bubba cooks, serves, hopefully cleans, and whatever else is involved in a mobile BBQ operation.  As a result, the service is quite slow.  People line up in the dust of a gravel parking lot and as was on the day we went, fry their asses off in the sun.  I am sure the winter is much more comfortable, not having to deal with the sun… oh wait, I forgot, there is a little problem with the cold.  That could be a tad uncomfortable whilst you wait for Bubba to slop up his ware.  I do not like waiting.  Waiting is bullshit.  There are a million restaurants that will take my money without making me stand in line in the heat (or the cold, for that matter).  If I am going to wait, it have better be FUCKING GOOD!  We arrived right at 11:30, MDW not having the pathological time thing going like 'moi'.  The line was about fifteen people long and the temperature was about 30 degrees.  GREAAAAAAAT!

     It took about twenty-five minutes to get our food, and it wasn't too bad.  There is really nothing I like more than making small talk with strangers waiting in line, or worse yet, listening to some twenty-two year old girls discussing their latest 'tweet' about having toast for breakfast.  I just love that. As the boy used to say, "do we KNOW these people?

     The day we went was a Wednesday and Bubba's only serves one thing per day, and that day it was pulled pork on a bun, with slaw and baked beans. Bubba seemed like a reasonable guy.  I have met him once before when I went to the south side location, and brilliantly, thinking I would come later to avoid the rush, I arrived to an empty parking lot, with Bubba cleaning up after selling out.  Lesson one: come early or go home hungry.  I had a little chat with Bubba and he told me about his operation and gave me a menu and told me to come early next time.  Duh.. thanks Bubba.

     The food, I must admit was a little disappointing.  There was nothing wrong with it.  It was good.  But it did not knock my socks off and remember what I said previously about if I was going to stand in line ….  I liked the slaw with a honey mustard dressing (which is quickly becoming my favorite dressing), and the beans were a mix of what looked like regular pork 'n beans with some kidney beans included, was ok, not great.  The pulled pork on a bun did not have any smoked taste as far as I, or MDW could tell.  There was very little sauce, although the portion was certainly large.  The bun was fresh.  Nothing spectacular at all.  Again, disappointing.  I expected more. I don't want to compare but MDW makes much better pulled pork and there is no comparison of her beans and Bubba's.  And we don't have to wait in line in the 'Fat Man's' kitchen.  The price was very reasonable: $11.00 each, plus a tip.

     When you take into account the parking situation, the lining up, having to endure the blah, blah, blah around you, limited daily menu, no place to sit and eat, and the threat of sever weather whilst waiting, and just good food (not great), I would rate Bubba's only a six or seven out of ten.  I would go again for the ribs perhaps, but like MDW said, that the smokey taste and sauce is what makes BBQ and Bubba didn't really have anything special going on in those areas; so…

     Edmonton needs a really good BBQ restaurant.  And as Kornheiser says, "End of story".

     

I Told You So!

Encarnacion just whiffed on a fourteen bouncer, to allow two runs.  Fucking unbelievable.  He better be wearing a cup because he's going to hurt himself.
By the way, this is just what Ricky Romero needs: having Jamie Moyer coach him on the finer points of nibbling around the plate.  Fucking great.  He never throws it over the plate as it is.  With Moyer's mentoring, he'll walk twelve guys a night and throw 150 pitches in four innings. Maybe he'll get hurt.

Oppps!

Sorry about the spelling of Encarnacion.  Didn't really check.  He still can't field, no matter how I spell his fucking name.

Little Bits of Brilliance...

A few things have been grinding my gears lately.  I spend a lot of time on Highway 16, driving to Vegreville and I have observed one interesting thing: evidently there is no speed limit in Saskatchewan.    What we have here is a total disregard for the law.  I drive a little over the speed limit on the Highway (117 KPH, usually), and I am amazed by the number to cars from Saskatchewan that literally go flying past me.  It is unbelievable.  I NEVER pass anyone from Sask., NEVER.  Perhaps they love their province so much that they can not wait to get back (good fucking riddance, I say!).  

Again, I tell you that the police should put radar cameras on every road.  They would make enough money to fund everything that the government needs.  There is no law in existence that is broken more than speeding.  Cameras would go a long way to slowing people down.  The only way to stop people from speeding is to hit them in the wallet.  The more money they get fined, the greater the chance of them deciding to slow down.  Money talks!  The only ones who oppose this are speeders... duh!

The terrible service that we all receive from businesses is mind-boggling.  I had two recent 'situations' that confirm that NO ONE provides good service.  I needed my eaves cleaned and I called a company to do it.  After they came and assessed the job, I got a call from they office to set up an appointment.  The lady told me that they would like to come on Monday the 18th.  I told her that was great, and I would be home.  She said I didn't have to be there... blah, blah, blah.  I remember specifically the conversation and wrote down the appointment on my iCal.  I waited around on Monday and by late afternoon they had not come.  MDW decided to call and see what was up.  The lady tells MDW that she told me Thursday and that is when they will be there.  BULLSHIT.  She said Monday.  Ok, so Thursday it is.  I go to the farm on Tuesday and when I get home, there is a note in my mailbox that they cleaned my eaves.  It is Tuesday, not Thursday.  WTF? They said Monday, claimed it was Thursday and came Tuesday.  Didn't they learn about days of the week in grade one? Retards!

It is great that you can buy things on line, eliminating stores from the process.  However, we now have to deal with delivery companies.  I was getting a delivery from Costco and the lady called to tell me that they would come Thursday.  I was unavailable and told them.  Friday?  Going out of town.  Monday, she asked and I said sure that is great.  She says ok, but we will have to charge you for storage.  Huh? $25 per day.  I went 'ka-mencky' (MDW's made up word for crazy).  After some back and forth, in which she said I didn't listen to what she had said (bullshit), she changed her mind and said Monday was fine without charging me.  Why did she tell me that if we waited for Monday, she would have to charge me and now it was ok?  Back-peddling Bee-atch.

By the way, on Sunday some retard came to my door and after ringing the door bell, opened my door and knocked...

Soccer has been riveting.  Goals galore.  Nothing like penalty kicks to decide an important game.  I am falling behind in my stupid soccer fact, and I don't really care that much about soccer so...

LBJ won a championship. Good for him.  I can hardly write that without throwing up a little in my mouth.  LBJ was great.  He has always been great.  There has never been a basketball player with his combination of freakish athletic abilities and skills.  I have never said he wasn't a great, great player.  But winning the way he has won taints any championships that he gets.  He had to gather together an all-star team to win.  He couldn't do it himself, or at least he didn't have the stick-to-it-ness to try.  He did the summer basketball thing and make an all star team that beats everyone because of talent, not hard work and team work.  To me basketball is about making a team from the players that you have, that team playing, practicing, losing/winning together.  That is what makes winning so special.  Just getting all the best players together on one team is like shooting fish in a barrel.  What accomplishment is that?  LBJ can win five championships and they will all be tainted.  If he won one championship in Cleveland, that would have been the sign of greatness.  If he wasn't such a choking dog, they would have won last year, and they should in a few in the years to come.  Of course if OKC would get rid of Perkins and Westbrook, they could win a few also. 

 I could not bring myself to watch Miami win.  I didn't watch the final.  I didn't care.  I knew LBJ was going to win.  The look on his face in game six against Boston told me all I needed to know.  He was determined.  He was focused. I had never seen him look that focused.   He wasn't trying to make everyone happy.  He wanted to fucking win and when you are as good as he is, it was inevitable that Miami was going to win.  He is unstoppable.  

Blue Jays drive me crazy.  There pitching is brutal.  If you are a starter or a reliever, you must be terrified these days.  If was a starter, I would decline going to the mound.  Four starters have gone down the past two weeks with major injuries.  Every time a starter goes to the mound they seem to get hurt.  I wouldn't go.

The relievers suck.  They suck horribly.  They should be afraid that they will get knocked silly every time they go out on the mound.  The relievers has a unique pitching style: it's called chuck and duck.  It is amazing that no one has gotten killed by line drives that the relievers throw.  Blue Jays have no chance improving with the relievers they have.  Out with the old, in with the new.  

The second base man Johnson sucks big time.  He can not catch a ground ball to save his soul and he strikes out an unbelievable amount.  It is tough on the lousy pitchers when they finally get a ground ball hit and it invariably ends up E-4.  Between Johnson and Encarnation, the entire right side of the infield is a error waiting to happen.  Luckily Encarnation can hit home runs because he is fucking time bomb when trying to catch anything.  In the dictionary, there is picture of him under the definition of Designated Hitter.  

Isn't baseball great?  I think what they need is few more unwritten rules, don't you?

Ohhh, Portugal and Spain later today.  I just can't wait...

Father's Day

Father's Day traditionally ends the U.S. Open golf championship. The annual attempt by the USGA to humble the professional golfers. I fucking hate this tournament. Why would I want to watch the best play like all the other hackers of the world? As I have said many times: if I want to watch bad golf, I will go watch the weekend warriors at Broadmoor. I watch sports for excellence,not mediocrity. I love that the USGA sets up the golf coarse to play about twenty thousand yards long, and to make it a little tougher,they make all landing areas about a foot and half wide. Nice. That is not too hard, is it? Then they shave the greens to the length of concrete, which makes putting next to impossible. Now what really pisses me off is why I continue to look for Tiger's score each day. I do not understand this. I will admit that I was Tiger fan throughout his reign as king. His abilities and domination of golf was unlike anything that sport had ever seen. To say he was the greatest ever is without question. He won literally at will in a sport that is tighter than the Olympic fairways. Scoring averages between the top fifty players had traditionally been .5 of a shot from one to fifty. Players were basically even. During Tiger's reign his scoring average would be two or three shots better than anyone else. That is fucking unbelieveable. Many statistical reports showed that his dominance had only been seen in sport before by Babe Ruth, Wayne Gretzky and Wilt Chamberlain. Then came the big fall, and since ... Tiger has been anything but Tiger. We have learned a great deal about the person Tiger is. He has broken down physically, with sever knee injuries. He has changed his swing to improve, which I have never understood. Hank Haney explained why Tiger changed his swing in his book, and it all made sense but my question will always be: what was the problem with his swing when he was winning 75% of the tournaments he entered and at least one major per year? I think he was just bored and changed just to motivate himself. The person that Tiger is, is not pretty. His self-centered-ness is unbareable. He basically shuts everyone else in the world out and those he does let in are mere surfs in his kingdom. He is not a nice person. He is not likeable. How can anyone like someone that only thinks of himself? After reading two or three books about Tiger, it is really hard to root for him and hope that he wins... But I still do. I don't fucking understand it. I'm not a front runner, cheering for the traditionally strong teams: the Yankees, Celtics, the Cowboys, UNC (ok, I love the Tar Heels but that has been thirty-four year torture that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy). But I can't stop watching Tiger. Why, why I ask you? I despise his arrogance, the way he treats everyone, his controlling of the game of golf, his womanizing ways, his supiority complex. There is nothing to cheer for anymore. His golf game sucks. He continues to tell everyone that he is really close, but he isn't. There is nothing there to watch, but I do. It' like a fucking addiction. I know it's wrong but... Someone help me, please Stupid soccer fact of the day: substitutions. WTF? Guy can't go off for a blow? Guy subs off... he's done for the day. Is it any wonder soccer players walk around three quarters of the game? They are scared if the run too much, they will get yanked. Maybe there would be the occasional goal if the players were a little more rested... I'm just sayin! Construction season. Isn't this fun? Reason I want to strangle Sherwood Park people. Last week I went to Safeways at seven fifteen A.M.to get some lunch items for the farm. There was no cars in the parking lot. As I came around the corner, there was an Escalade parked in the Fire Zone, right by the door. I parked in the first parking stall and before I got out, some cow comes out of door carrying...what else but a cup of Starbucks coffee. When I came out, I counted the steps from where this special person was parked and my spot: sixteen steps. Forty-eight feet. FUCK! This cow couldn't walk fifty feet. Fucking pathetic. We scream about getting the world to work together for world peace, or being green and we can't get yuppie cows to walk fifty fucking feet for a double Mocha Pocha Tocha. Selfishness, inconsideration, stupidity, laziness, entitlement, or just plain assholeness. You chose the word to describe someone who will not walk fifty fucking feet to pay $6.00 for a cup of coffee. There's something wrong in the world today We don't know what it is Something wrong with our eyes We're seeing things in a different way And God knows it ain't His It sure ain't no surprise. We're living on the edge... Aerosmith

Fucking Rondo (having taken over from Fucking Turkoglu)

Is Rondo not the most arrogant little prick you ever saw?  I blame him entirely for the Celtics losing.  Isn't it interesting that there is any team on earth that I would want to lose more than the Celtics?  But I have found one in the Heat.  And that fucking weasel Rondo pissed it away yesterday.  I have gone on and on about Rondo being overrated.  He runs around after the ball like a junior high player and when he steals the ball, the announcers talk about his great defensive skills.  BULLSHIT.  He couldn't guard a fucking fence post.
Let's talk about his wonderful shooting.  Again he's like junior high student who need to line up his shot, take aim, bring his elbow in and finally release the ball.  It takes about a week and a half for him to get his shot off.  And even then, it has almost no chance of going in.   The Heat never even though about guarding him.  Just don't let him drive.  He confused the world by making all those jump shots in game 2 or 3, but that was a aberration.  In yesterday's game he wouldn't/couldn't shoot when unguarded.  How does a team win when you only have four guys playing offense?  He is a detriment to them offensively.  And he dominates the ball, dribbling, dribbling, dribbling.  Then they have to rush and get off a shot at the end of the clock.
He can't be trusted in a close game at the end because he does not shoot free throws well, again making him a detriment to the team. On top of all of this he is like a show off with the ball.  He would prefer to make a ridiculous fancy pass instead of a simple pass, every time.  Yesterday he throw the ball away several times on passes that bordered on the retarded.  He is such a 'look at me' player that winning seems like the last thing on his mind.  "Look at me everyone, I can throw a bounce pass behind my back and through someones legs". He is unbelievably selfish, wanting to be the center of attention on every play.  Many of his passes have less chance of getting caught than Tebow's passes.  On top of that he has no fundamental skills.  Have you ever seen him use his left hand on a layup?  His footwork is horrible and he  needs to water his left hand to keep it alive.
 Let's recap his skills so far: doesn't guard anyone, can't piss in the ocean, dribbles too much, makes ridiculous and ill-advised  passes, terrible fundamentals, and can't make free throws in the clutch.  Hmmmm?
He does some things very well.  He is an amazing rebounder for a point guard.  He is a very good passer, some of the time  (you throw enough shit at the wall, some of it will stick).  He is as quick as lightening.  I'm sure he's rich.  I got nothing else.
Now what really pisses me off about Rondo is his arrogance.  He struts around like he is a fucking super-duper star.  He will never acknowledge that one of his ridiculous passes just may have been his mistake.  He just sticks that fucking jaw out like to say "not my fault".  He walks like he is Michael fucking Jordan, when he plays like Michael fucking Jackson.  Confidence is one thing, but arrogance is another.  He cost the Celtics that game yesterday before the fourth quarter.  He missed easy lay-ups, than attempted impossible passes, he threw the ball away, he missed wide open jumpers and he continued to dribble, dribble, dribble. If he was a team player and really wanted to win instead of being the star attraction, the Celtics would have beaten the Heat yesterday, because Miami was certainly there for the taking.  In the first three quarters.  The Celtics could have been ahead by 12-18 going into the final quarter and  they could have watched as the Miami Heat-les implode.  But no, fucking Rondo had to try to put on show and fail miserably, causing the game to be close and eventually the Heat pulling away.
Fucking Rondo.  Beside; he from fucking Kentucky.  Enough said!

Stupid Soccer Thing:
Describing a goal had goes in off their own teammate as a 'self-goal' is fucking stupid.  Self goal, what a dumb-assed soccer thing to say.

Wayne- eutheus

Prometheus (Greek: Προμηθεύς) is a Titan, culture hero, and trickster figure who in Greek mythology is credited with the creation of man from clay and the theft of fire for human use, an act that enabled progress and civilization. He is known for his intelligence, and as a champion of mankind.^[1]

The punishment of Prometheus as a consequence of the theft is a major theme of his mythology, and is a popular subject of both ancient and modern art. Zeus, king of the Olympian gods, sentenced the Titan to eternal torment for his transgression. The immortal Prometheus was bound to a rock, where each day an eagle, the emblem of Zeus, was sent to feed on his liver, only to have it grow back to be eaten again the next day.

   I feel somewhat violated, or at least ripped off.  The movie Prometheus has hit the big screen and I can't help but feel they are stolen my idea.  I think my movie about Prometheus would have been a classic. I haven't seen the new movie but I have seen the trailers for  it and it looks like some sci-fi drivel.  My version would be slightly different.  Here is how the movie of Prometheus should have gone:

   A few years ago, the boy and I were traveling in the car.  I know it was quite a few years ago because he was still indulging me by listening and sharing his opinion.  Me, in my usual calm, reasonable, unbiased way, began telling him about how the referees were killing me.  He asked why and I, again, with tremendous calm, told him that each night I go to my games with such good intentions.  I would go with my usual patience, understanding, and most important, positiveness, in the belief that the good fellows (or gals, for that matter), would do a knock up job officiating the game.  And despite my unwavering belief in the goodness and honesty of the hard working officials, in the end, I would get royally fucked.   I would happen over and over again. 

The boy, ever the scholar, retorted with, "Hey that sounds like Prometheus."  Me of course, also scholastically inclined said "Huh?"  The boy said that he knows a Greek legend that was very similar to my story.  I bade the boy to go on.  

He began the story of Prometheus, and with his interest in Indo-European languages, if I remember correctly, he spoke in Ancient Greek.  I cut him short with "Hey Einstein, English.  Remember the car rules about using words I don't know?" (This unfortunately was the reason that the amount of talks we had in the car was next to zero!)  So the boy told me the story of how Prometheus had told the secret of fire to humans and Zeus was so angry that he tied Prometheus to a rock and each day a giant eagle would come and tear out his liver, only to have it regrow over night and happen again the next day.  

EUREKA I cried.  That is me.  Each day I go to my game, filled with positive energy, only to have my liver ripped out.  The referees are the eagle and I am bound to my chair, forever tortured by the eagles in grey. (The irony of eagles have such great eyesight and the officials obviously not having similar skills is humorous contradiction, isn't it?)   And why?  

Like Prometheus, I have been victimized unfairly.  Prometheus had a slight slip of the tongue, telling humans something that, perhaps, he shouldn't have.  I too have had the occasional slip of the tongue, saying somethings to officials that, perhaps, I shouldn't have said.  But does the punishment fit the crime?  Hey, humans would have figured out fire sooner than later, right?  Poor Prometheus only sped up the process.  My advice to officials is usually 100% correct, if they would just shut up and listen.  The similarities between Prometheus and I are eery. 

Now they have stolen my idea for a Prometheus movie.   They have created sic-fi thriller with cool creatures, space crafts and other bullshit.  Wouldn't you all rather see a movie about poor me, being tortured over and over again by some overweight, partially blind, idiots?  

NBA Officials...?

I have to apologise. I said last week that the NBA officials were horrible. I was really, really wrong. They are way, way, way, way worse than that. They are a fucking joke. A joke. Tweedle Dumb, Tweedle Dumber, and Tweedle Dumbest. The three blind mice. See No Evil, See No Evil and See No Evil. What the fuck are they watching? They get nothing correct. At one point tonight the three idiots missed a kick ball in the open court. All three of them missed it. How is that possible? Oh, let's go cover our asses and check the replay. We want to get it right. Ya get it fucking right the first time you retards. My only solution to this is shirts and skins, call your own. At least then you know that you are going to get fucked, but you can reciprocate. The way it is now with these idiots, you know your going to get screwed but you have no chance of equaling things out. Maybe we will be lucky and 'Crocodile Arms' Crawford will ref every game in the finals. No wonder Tim Duncan wanted to fight him a couple of years ago. Wouldn't that have been a funny. Duncan reaching out with his long arms,holding Crawford's forehead, whilst Joey flailed away with those freakishly short arms. Duncan could have finished him off with a Three Stooges' bonk on the top of his head. Great pay-for-view. Ohhhh, Mr. Mean Garnett just got a T. Great call idiot #1.

LBJ - Boo, Hoo, Hoo!

When the 'big three' made their splashy pronouncement, I was luckily in Macedonia.  It was World Cup semi-finals and the Macedonians couldn't have given a flying fuck about LBJ and the other superstars ganging up.  LBJ said that it would be not one, or two but seven championships.  What he must have meant that they would lose, not once, not twice but perhaps seven times.  

How is it possible for the Heat to lose?  As much as a loath LBJ, he is a tremendous basketball player.  He is certainly a HOF player but will he ever win?  It seems almost impossible that he hasn't won yet.  Wade is a great, great player and to stop two players of that caliber is a coach's nightmare.  

Yet, the Heat are on the verge of losing again.  Will they use Bosh's injury as their excuse for not winning?  I rarely watch the Heat, as I refuse to spend time watching an all-star team.  I have zero respect for them.  

They are perfect example of the young players of this generation.  They want to be considered great and equal to the all-time great...without having accomplished anything.  They are the world's most talented wannabes.  The young generation watch the superficial stars of today, who would rather look cool than be good, and they think that that is way basketball is played.  They actually think that the fucking morons running around trying to dunk everything, or just dribble around and shoot a three makes them the greatest players in history.  They are so fucking naive that it is laughable.

  Today's players are all all about looks and building their brands.  That is the Heat.  They live in Miami.  They live the South Beach lifestyle.  The music plays, the girls dance, they dunk or shoot threes.  What the fuck kind of basketball players are they?  Do you really think that when things get tough, as they always do come playoff time, these prima donnas are not going to get dirty and do the things that it takes to win championships?  Defending, rebounding, scuffing around for loose balls, screening, getting your nose dirty and being willing to pay the price is the recipe for winning.  The Heat don't have a lot of those characteristic.  They would rather just be cool.  

I know I am an old fart but the players today, despite being so much more incredibly talented both physically and skill wise, have not one fucking clue about how to play basketball.  Basketball is a team game.  Five guys playing together.  Now it is just stand around until the clock is down to two and huck up a fucking brick, and if it goes in, will lead to dancing and gyrating in the isles. Throw in some fucking retard blocking shots into the stands and every idiot will scream about how these are the best players ever.  Are you fucking kidding me?  

Oh oh, I am going off on a rant.  I need to focus on the Heat and the possibility that they are going to lose.  Lose to the the fucking Celtics, led by pretend tough guy KG.  Ohhhhhh, see how mean he can look.  The fucking Celtics are on average of about forty fucking years old, and they can still beat the Heat.  That is lame.  Rondo is beating them.  Rondo, who plays zero defense.  ZERO.  He just runs around trying to steal the ball.  He must have played at Jean Vanier, with Nestransky.  Just running around and beating people because he's a better athlete than others.  Hey, Dumb-asses, that does not make him a great player.  Here's a little hint Rondo, work on the jumper.  If you want to be good, you have to be able to piss in the ocean.

My last rant will be about Perkins.  He is fucking useless.  A complete waste of skin.  If his head wasn't tiny like a grape, he would get hit in the face on a regular basis because he can not fucking catch anything.  He has the worst hands in the world.  It looks like his hands are flat boards and he tries to catch the ball by squashing the ball between them.  I am all for players playing intensely but he is a fucking knob.  Lighten up Francis.  I am sure that he stands at the foul lane and says " you touch my ball... I'll kill ya."  "You block my shot... I'll kill ya."  Rebounding requires that you can catch the ball.  That is why Perkins gets no boards.  He just chases the ball around like a fucking dog chasing a bone.  He is pathetic.    I am not sure I have seen him score this entire playoffs.  The fact that OKC can win with Perkins, tells you how great Kevin Durant is.  He is surprisingly strong, having to carry Perkins, Ebaka, and that fucking maniac Westbrook to the championship.  He looks quite slim but he must be like Grover, who used to say "I may be small, but I'm wiry."  

Stupid Soccer Fact:  The Beautiful Game...Huh?  What the fuck is beautiful about soccer?  The no goals? The hooligans killing people?  The flopping?  The life-threatening injuries when someone looks at someone else?  Soccer fans tell me "You don't understand soccer."  Really?  Let me see... you try to kick the ball into a net without using your hands.  Ahhh, that's about it.  What am I missing?  Strategy?  Are you fucking kidding me?  What... no other sport has any strategy?  Give me fucking break.  There is more strategy in five minute of football than five years of soccer.  Strategy my ass.

The beautiful game... ya right. 

Many Apologies

Sorry about the way the latest blogs are written (all bunched together, no indents or the paragraphs running together, etc.). When I write on my iPad, that is what happens. I don't know how to correct it so .... As for the bad grammer and spelling, well that's just my lousy writing and not much can be done about that without returning to grade one and starting over. I would suggest patience and sympathy would be your best course of action.

Referees - Booooooooo!

Sitting and watching the SA/OKC game and thinking about how lousy the refs are in the NBA. This made then think about the officials in the other main sports: NHL, MLB,NFL and of course the EPL.. just joking. Who gives a fiddlers fuck about soccer, let alone soccer refs? Let's start with the NHL. I think the refs in the NHL are OK. They don't suck and they are not great. They use to really, really suck in the playoffs, but I think they have gotten better. There are more penalties called in playoff games, even in the late going and overtime. NFL: The game of football is unbelieveably hard to officiate, I think. Where do you begin when it comes to penalties? There are probably 10-20 penalties on each and every play, so when do you call one? I think they take a bit of a 'I haven't called one in awhile, so I will' or a 'I just called one, so I won't ' approach. I don't the refs in football do a very good job, but it's an impossible task, so I'm not really negative towards them. I think they are just happy at the end of the game that they survived and hopefully so do the players. That's all you can hope for in football. MLB: I think the baseball umps are the best. They get most of the calls correct, not saying that they don't fuck up at times, but generally they get it right. I watched a game the other night in which, after watching four or five different camera shots of the play, it did not show undeniable proof one way or another what the call was. How can you say the ump is incorrect in making the call he did. That's what he thought it was, and he had to make a quick decision. Most bang-bang plays in baseball are like that. They don't have the benefit of instant replay. It's close and they decide. Many, many time the instant replays prove the umpire correct and if they are wrong, again; bang/bang, they make a call. And if it's so close that even instant replay is not conclusive, then the ump made the right call. Now what makes the MLB umpires unbearable is their contentiousness. They are fucking assholes. They cause more problems than any other official. They turn a fleck of sand into a dessert storm. They don't know when to shut the fuck up and just umpire. They antagonize players/coaches, goading them on. If they just shut the fuck up, things would be great, but no, they have to have the last word. Then they get to do what they love to do: toss someone out. Ohhhh, look at me. I can kick someone out of the game. I'm important. Fucking jerks. I left the worst for the last. NBA refs are the worst. The fucking worst by the distance from here to Saturn. They are brutal. They get nothing right. They don't call the rules of the game. They repeatedly do make-up calls to correct their fuck ups from the last play. They decide what are rules and what are not rules. Are traveling and carrying the ball still rules, because players today can commit these infractions endlessly with being called. What exactly is a foul? Is it the same when LBJ gets hit as when, the backup center for OKC gets hit? No fucking way. Superstars are reffed different than stars. Stars are reffed different than role players. Forget about the scrubs on the bench, they don't have a fucking chance with officals. A foul in the first quarter should be a foul in the fourth quarter. Is it? Ha, ha. No fucking way. NBA officials look at the score, the player, the situation before they make a call. That's a fucking joke. No one knows when a foul is going to be called, except of course the superstar, who knows that he will get every call because of who he is. Again... a fucking joke. NBA refs run a close second to the MLB umps for goading players/coaches on and giving them technical fouls. I have always said that a fucking monkey can give a player/coach a technical. That takes no reffing skill at all. All you have to be able to do is to signal the letter T with your hands, not exactly a tremendous accomplishment. I am surprised that an NBA player hasn't killed an official. Squash them like a bug. I have said this before but who hasn't thought about doing that to an official? Like the old Rosanne Barr joke when she was asked about what she thought about the Salt Lake City lady who stabbed her husband twenty times. Rosanne said "I admire her restraint." Basketball refs should thank their lucky stars that one of the thyroidial (made up word!) giants that they walk with don't strangulate them just for fun. Maybe they should go back to reffing the rules correctly, as they are written in the rule book. Oh wait, that would infer that they can read. STUPID SOCCER FACT OF THE DAY: What is the fucking deal with soccer teams kicking the ball back to their own goalie? They do this many, many times during each game. Have you ever seen that happen in hockey? Ohh, here's a great idea... we have the puck at the other team's blueline, but let's pass it back to Patrick Roy and let him pass to someone to start the attack again. Fucking ridiculous. And they wonder why there is no scoring in soccer. Maybe it's because most teams get more shots on their own goal than on the opponents net. That would limit the scoring opportunities, wouldn't it??? What a fucking lame-ass game!

Stupid Soccer Fact #2

I just about forgot to include my soccer stupidity for today: Only is soccer would they have a TV show called 'The Footy Show'. WTF is that? The footy show? Is that some kind of fetish channel that Rex Ryan would appreciate? Again: L - A - M - E

Yawn, San Antonio is Going to Win

I really shouldn't complain about the fact that San Antonio will win the NBA championship again this year. I bitch and moan about the horrible play in the league and how the young players have no clue about playing basketball. It's all about dunks and threes, which is absolutely the worst way to play basketball. But, San Antonio plays basketball. I should be singing their praise over and over again, but I have such a hard time embracing them. They are not really likeable. Look at their players: Duncan is fantastic. The most under-appreciated player in the history of the league. He is amazing, even at this stage of his career. He is certainly not the Tim Duncan of ten years ago, but he is still dominating. But he also a whinning jerk, who complains about every call. He is not likeable at all. Never was, never will be. HOF! Parker is incredible. If he ever learns to shave, he probably could get a movie star to stay married to him. He is so quick. His mid-range jump shot is money. No one can guard him. But he is from France. He alwayts looks condecending, as if he has no time for anyone. And of course he has a little bit of the soccer player in him, embellishing any contact he receives. The French have never been loved and it is easy to see why with Parker. HOF Gnobelli: How would like to meet him in a dark alley? He would rip your lungs out without a second thought. But he can fucking play. I do not think I have ever seen a better sixth man in all the time I have watched the NBA. He is sure-fire HOF player. He may be the best foreign player to ever play the game, even better than Dirk Diddler. Danny Green: Caroling guy. Can't dislike him. Bonner: What's to like? Stiff, slow, Florida. But Popovich gets the best out of him and he is valuable player. Seems like he never misses a three. Stephan Jackson: Thug. Felon. Hateful. But he can play. Splitter: Huh? Brazilian stiff, but contributes because he plays only against the other team's bench players and they suck worse than him. Leonard: rookie, is afraid to make a mistake or Parker will send him to the French Foreign Legion. Very talented and contributes whatever he can Diaw: Cow. Lard-ass. Another player from France, who is not nearly as good as Parker. Somehow he starts and contributes. He must be happy to be in San An-tone, because he is easily unfocused. This result is him sucking horribly. Not so in SA Popovich: Easily the best coach in the NBA and has been for a long, long time. Ten times the coach that Phil Jackson was. He gets players to play or he sits their rich asses down on the bench. Players obviously buy in or else they are terrified of him. Either way is good. HOF coach. Has won 4 championships and will win again this year. When will he get the recognition he deserves? Other bench guys just contribute when called upon. They don't complain. They know they are llucky to be there and if they just shut up and play when asked, they will get a ring. Of course SA is playing OKC. Other than Durant, who in my opinion is the best player in the league, OKC is not too sharp. Westbrook is a retard. Along with LBJ, he is the best physical specimen in the league. He's unbelieveable,but I am not too sure he is very bright. And Perkins? WTF is up with him? Mr. Mean. More like Mr. Bad Hands. Or perhaps Mr. Zero Offensive Ability. Is he fuking useless or what? He does sweat amazing amounts from that tiny little beard he has, but that is not really a serviceable basketball skill is it? Is it possible for OKC to score inside the key with their big men? You can not win a chimpionship without some kind of inside game. OKC has none. NONE! I do like Harden. I am watching and OKC get a little run and Pop calls a time out and really fucking gives it to Parker. That's why he is a great coach: he grinds everyone. Parker is giving him the soccer goalie excuse: thowing his hands in the air and blaming others. Pop just fucking grinds him. I love it. So, maybe I should be more open to appreciating SA for what they are: a great team, with great leaders and a great coach. They play the game the way it should be played and they are coached by a guy who demands that they play that way. By the way, Popovich does have some Carolina connection, which explains his excellence.

A Little Reason I Want to Crash Into Most People in Sherwood Park

I've had a frustrating, albeit, successful day of retirement.  As a great man once said, "Busy, busy, busy!"  The frustration came mainly from my interactions with Home Depot and their lack of product.  When you buy a grass trimmer from a store, is it not reasonable to expect this store to have the replacement spool you need when you inevitably run our of cord?  But no... I have to buy the cord by itself and wind it into the exciting spool that I have.  I don't know about you, but I have had very little success with that whole situation in the past.  I prefer to buy the pre-wound spools, which cost more but fuck it's only a couple of bucks, so what's the big whoop?  Perhaps when you buy a new grass trimmer, a person should buy a life-time supply of spools?  Oh, sure, it would cost you a lot but then the store would have your money and not have to worry (like they do..) about you not being able to provide the correct spool for you.  What a fucking gong show...
 My real frustration came at a red light.  Go figure...  I was turning west onto Wye Road from Rona and I was facing a car with a women, who was looking down (the universal sign for I am texting someone, or I am reading a text or email from my electronic device).  She was not signalling.  The light changed and two cars beside her came straight through and I waited while she navel gazed or whatever.  Suddenly she looked up and went.  She put on her signal light on and turned left, right in front of me as I had moved out to make my left turn.   I sat there with my thumb up my rear end, not knowing what to do.  She continued on merrily on her way, completely unaware of what a fucking retard she was.
That is why driving in Sherwood Park is is the bane of my existence ...

I see there is going to be major coverage of the European Soccer Championship.  I can't fucking wait.  About six months ago, in the dentists office, whilst waiting for my mother-in-law (see what a good son-in-law I am), I wrote all  the things about soccer that drove me fucking crazy.  I have a very, very long list.  So for this spectacular soccer event, I think I will share my thoughts on a regular basis.  Soccer really is the stupidest sport in the world and needs to be exposed for its stupidness.  I will give you a little  pre-tournament sampling of why soccer sucks:
No sport worth anything would call its exhibition games 'friendlies'.  What a fucking stupid name.  Friendlies?  Please...  Ohhhhh, Ireland and England are playing a friendly. L - A - M - E

Like Eric Burton said "we gotta get out of this place"

If it's the last thing we ever do. That's the next line of the old Animals song that Sherwood Park makes me think of. If you have read the Sherwood Park News today,there is two tremendously disturbing articles. The first is on the front page about how there is going to be a bit of a traffic problem due to the fact that the 300 car parking lot for the main bus station on Wye Road will be lost due to expansion of the Anthony Henday. WTF? They want people to use public transportation yet they don't provide any parking for people when they use it. Great solutions they provide to solve this 'minor' problem: take another bus there, walk, car pool with someone, or perhaps ride your bike there. Isn't that fucking wonderful. They want you to be green, but they didn't have the forsite to see these problems and do something when the shit hits the fan. Were/are the city planners incompetent or what? If you have been up to the transit station by Home Depot lately, the parking on the road that runs from Boston Pizza to the bus station is ridiculous. The entire mile consists of cars on both sides of the road, making it a fucking goat path. The parking lot at the station holds about a hundred cars and about five hundred are needed. The planning for Sherwood Park has been pathetic,from parking to the brilliant, let's put a traffic light every hundred meters. A FUCKING JOKE! Which leads to the other story. The other headline that makes me want to throw up reads '100,000 people by 2016'. Isn't that great. That's just what Sherwood Park needs: more fucking people! I moved here in 1964 and there was 5,000 people. Soon there will be one hundred thousand people. If that does not make you cringe, I don't know what will. Luckily there is the same two main roads to Edmonton now as there was then, because we wouldn't want to have any traffic problems would we? (By the way Edmonton, thanks for the fucking bridge problem at the beginning of the Sherwood Park Freeway. That little detour is lovely). One hundred thousand people. Great. So let me get this straight: there is no parking, the roads are full all of the time, traffic control consists of a never ending amount of traffic lights and there is no solutions to these problems... but we going to have more people? Brilliant, fucking brilliant! 'We gotta get out of this place If it's the last thing we ever do, We gotta get out of this place Girl, there's a better life for me and you...' The Animals 1965

Baseball Blues
  As most of you know, I love baseball.  There are many things I love about the game, but I would rather talk about a few things that bug me about baseball.  Not the obvious: boredom, but instead a couple of little things that drive me crazy.
The contact play.  WTF?  Why would anyone, anytime, use this fucking stupid play.  Few you who don't fully understand all the finer points of baseball, the contact play is when there is a runner on third base, with less than two outs, and on any contact by the batter, runs for home.  So unless the ball is hit directly at an infielder, the runner should score, I guess that is the thinking.  I would like to see the fucking data on what % or runners make it home on that play.  It seems to me that the % is not more than 20%, which is fucking useless.  It invariably ends up in a throw home and the runner being out from here to Hoboken.  Stupid play.
Next thing that infuriates me about baseball is all the unwritten rules that are involved.  You don't steal when far behind; or far ahead, don't watch you home run go into the stands, where and when to slide have a plethora or unwritten rules, throwing at a batter after the player in front of him hits a home run (like that is the next batter's fucking fault) you hit one of mine: I hit one of yours, don't throw at someone above the shoulders (but it is ok to drill someone in the ass or the back - do you know how much that fucking hurts???), no stealing signs from the other team, run hard all the time or someone will plunk you next time up - just to teach you a lesson, don't take extra bases in a blowout, whether you are ahead of behind, as well and many, many more.
Unwritten rules suck.  I am a rules person.  If there is a rule, write it down and I will follow it.  Screw the wink, wink, nudge, nudge, everyone knows you're not supposed to do that.  Stupid baseball tradition.

    I am inspired to do more blogging.  It's not that I don't have anything to do... I am busier than when I had a full time job.
    It has been an interesting spring.  Lousy weather, baseball beginning, hockey playoffs, Neil's wedding, NBA excitement (yawn!), and work, work, work.  Oh, let's not fogey that the fucking road construction season is upon us.  Isn't that nice.  I will use the old Red Skeleton line about Edmonton: "It's a nice city... if they ever finish it!"
    Leading pet peeves about road construction: 1) sign-age - is it possible to put a sign further than fifty feet from the beginning of the worksite.   You're driving and boom, you're in the wrong fucking lane, going over the speed limit with the threat of double payment fines.  Nice. 2) When they decide to put up a sign that there is a lane closure ahead, is it too much to ask for some indication of which lane is closed?  You're driving along and the sign says lane closed ahead and suddenly you are in Vegas betting on which lane is the correct one.  Of course I am a gigantic loser and always pick the wrong lane and end up angry, frustrated and swearing.  Just fucking tell me which lane is closed; I can read, I will move over.  Fuck!
    Isn't is great that Edmonton is pretending to be 'environmentally' aware by designating lanes in the city with bike paths and the lovely sign to 'share the road'.  Fuck you!  There is not enough space on most city roads to have two cars drive safely and now they want the bikes to have a lane.  What a great way to move traffic through the city... lessen the number of lanes available.  Ridiculous! I understand that bike riding is a good way to cut down the traffic, but Edmonton is not designed to have bikers on the same driving areas as vehicles.  Maybe the brilliant minds that designed the city and its streets should have been a little more forward thinking to foresee the problems that are occurring now.  I do not know the answer but I will complain anyways.
    Last thing: has anyone been through the intersection on Baseline at the Sobey's?  They are ripping the whole fucking thing up and reorganizing the intersection.  It has not been around for that long and they are completely redoing it?  WTF?  Who was the brilliant mind that planned that intersection in the first place?  It's not like it has been there fifty years and just needs upgrading.  It can't be more than twenty years old and it needs redoing?
I havegot to get out of Sherwood Park....

'Great Expectations'

Well, that's it.  Their done.  My Tar Heels are officially, and in my eyes, thankfully done.  A more disappointing group I have never witnessed.  They epitomized the old cheer, "0-V-E-R-R-A-T-E-D", CLAP, CLAP, CLAP!
This year's team was ranked number one in the pre-season and several idiots spoke of an undefeated season.  Are you fucking kidding me?  I don't care that they returned five starters from last year's elite eight team.  They were overrated last year, squeaking out a bunch of wins in which they had no right to win. They won about a half dozen games in which they were down double digit numbers and because they could play without pressure at that point, just shot  three after three.  When it doesn't matter if you make them or not, because the game is basically over, it is easy to come back.  This build false hope.
This year's team was going to be a reasonably good team, but they lacked too many of the characteristics that make a champion.  They were going to win most of their games due to their talent.  They have at least a half dozen Mcdonald's All-Americans on the roster.  Winning games is easy when you are better than most of the teams you play.  Schedule the fucking Sister of the Holy Communion girls team, if you want to win.  It's the games against the good teams that tells whether or not you are a true contender for the championship.
The season started on the fucking battle ship against Michigan State and despite winning easily, UNC looked very soft.  This would be a common occurrence throughout the season.  Toughness would be their downfall.  Basketball is a game of push.  You either push back or you roll over in the grass and take it.  It is amazing to me that Carolina could be the best rebounding team in America and still be softer than shit.  That is an amazing contradiction.  They got every rebound, except the tough ones, the ones you need to get to win the tough games.
What is more important: toughness in mind or toughness in body?  This team had neither.  When the going got tough, they fucking wilted.  Look at the two FSU games, the Duke debacle.  Those are games in which championship teams suck it up and win.  They have more talent than the other teams, but it takes some hair to win tough games, against tough opponents. Carolina is bald.
This team is epitomized by the promise of two players.  Harrison Barnes and John Henson.  Both came to UNC with tremendous potential and expectations.  Both were expected to be one and done players.  Barnes was even rated as a first team all-American in his freshmen year; the first player to ever be given that honour.  As of today, I think it would be safe to say that neither of these two young men have achieved their potential, and in fact have far underachieved what was expected of them.
Barnes can't shoot consistently and he is poor ball handler.  If he dribbles more than twice it is almost a certain turnover .  Sure he makes shots in bunches and as a former assistant coach once said "when he's hot he never misses."  Duh.  Who the fuck misses when they are hot?  That is no fucking good.  What you need is someone who makes consistently.  Barnes is nothing but a streak shooter and this year his streaks have been mostly bad.  Even his fouls shooting is fucking useless.  He doesn't rebound well for someone six foot eight and his defense if average.  Overrated.  If he is drafted in the top ten this year, it would be a joke.
Henson is fucking Grover from Sesame Street. Sure he blocks shots and gets ten rebounds a game.  But they are not the tough rebounds.  His offense is fucking useless.  Somewhere, sometime, someone told him that he had a great left handed jump hook.  Whoever that was should be taken out back and beaten severely.  That fucking hook makes me want to throw up.  It has zero chance of going in and he shoots a couple of them a game, not just from six feet away, but he likes to extend his range to about fifteen.  If I was scorekeeping, every time he shot that piece of shit, I would mark it down as a turnover, because the other team get the ball every time without Carolina scoring.  Have you seen Henson shoot free throws?  No chance.  None.  His range is dunk.  That's all. His passing is a fucking joke.  He couldn't break a pane of glass which a chest pass, mainly because he zero upper body strength.  He does smile a lot thought.
Now Carolina's only hope is to back up the truck and get rid of these clowns.  In thirty-six years, I have never wanted a Carolina player to declare early for he draft.  I am already on my knees praying that Barnes and Henson leave.  They have nowhere to go but downhill if they stay.
Too bad that Kendal Marshall will probably go also, which he shouldn't because he is a good collage player but I don't see an NBA future in his game.  He can't shoot, can't guard a fucking fence post, has minimal foot speed and little quickness.  Other than that, he's terrific.  He is a great collage point guard and a winner.  That is what Carolina needs to build upon for next year.
Of course UNC has more talent coming into the program next year.  I just hope they add a little toughness to go along with the talent. Or I will be writing this same lament next year, as  I have in thirty-two of the thirty-six years as a faithful(?) Tar Heel fan.
The best way to describe how it feels to be a Tar Heel fan is the story from Greek mythology that the boy introduced me to.  Look up the story of Prometheus.  That's how I feel.