'Great Expectations'

Well, that's it.  Their done.  My Tar Heels are officially, and in my eyes, thankfully done.  A more disappointing group I have never witnessed.  They epitomized the old cheer, "0-V-E-R-R-A-T-E-D", CLAP, CLAP, CLAP!
This year's team was ranked number one in the pre-season and several idiots spoke of an undefeated season.  Are you fucking kidding me?  I don't care that they returned five starters from last year's elite eight team.  They were overrated last year, squeaking out a bunch of wins in which they had no right to win. They won about a half dozen games in which they were down double digit numbers and because they could play without pressure at that point, just shot  three after three.  When it doesn't matter if you make them or not, because the game is basically over, it is easy to come back.  This build false hope.
This year's team was going to be a reasonably good team, but they lacked too many of the characteristics that make a champion.  They were going to win most of their games due to their talent.  They have at least a half dozen Mcdonald's All-Americans on the roster.  Winning games is easy when you are better than most of the teams you play.  Schedule the fucking Sister of the Holy Communion girls team, if you want to win.  It's the games against the good teams that tells whether or not you are a true contender for the championship.
The season started on the fucking battle ship against Michigan State and despite winning easily, UNC looked very soft.  This would be a common occurrence throughout the season.  Toughness would be their downfall.  Basketball is a game of push.  You either push back or you roll over in the grass and take it.  It is amazing to me that Carolina could be the best rebounding team in America and still be softer than shit.  That is an amazing contradiction.  They got every rebound, except the tough ones, the ones you need to get to win the tough games.
What is more important: toughness in mind or toughness in body?  This team had neither.  When the going got tough, they fucking wilted.  Look at the two FSU games, the Duke debacle.  Those are games in which championship teams suck it up and win.  They have more talent than the other teams, but it takes some hair to win tough games, against tough opponents. Carolina is bald.
This team is epitomized by the promise of two players.  Harrison Barnes and John Henson.  Both came to UNC with tremendous potential and expectations.  Both were expected to be one and done players.  Barnes was even rated as a first team all-American in his freshmen year; the first player to ever be given that honour.  As of today, I think it would be safe to say that neither of these two young men have achieved their potential, and in fact have far underachieved what was expected of them.
Barnes can't shoot consistently and he is poor ball handler.  If he dribbles more than twice it is almost a certain turnover .  Sure he makes shots in bunches and as a former assistant coach once said "when he's hot he never misses."  Duh.  Who the fuck misses when they are hot?  That is no fucking good.  What you need is someone who makes consistently.  Barnes is nothing but a streak shooter and this year his streaks have been mostly bad.  Even his fouls shooting is fucking useless.  He doesn't rebound well for someone six foot eight and his defense if average.  Overrated.  If he is drafted in the top ten this year, it would be a joke.
Henson is fucking Grover from Sesame Street. Sure he blocks shots and gets ten rebounds a game.  But they are not the tough rebounds.  His offense is fucking useless.  Somewhere, sometime, someone told him that he had a great left handed jump hook.  Whoever that was should be taken out back and beaten severely.  That fucking hook makes me want to throw up.  It has zero chance of going in and he shoots a couple of them a game, not just from six feet away, but he likes to extend his range to about fifteen.  If I was scorekeeping, every time he shot that piece of shit, I would mark it down as a turnover, because the other team get the ball every time without Carolina scoring.  Have you seen Henson shoot free throws?  No chance.  None.  His range is dunk.  That's all. His passing is a fucking joke.  He couldn't break a pane of glass which a chest pass, mainly because he zero upper body strength.  He does smile a lot thought.
Now Carolina's only hope is to back up the truck and get rid of these clowns.  In thirty-six years, I have never wanted a Carolina player to declare early for he draft.  I am already on my knees praying that Barnes and Henson leave.  They have nowhere to go but downhill if they stay.
Too bad that Kendal Marshall will probably go also, which he shouldn't because he is a good collage player but I don't see an NBA future in his game.  He can't shoot, can't guard a fucking fence post, has minimal foot speed and little quickness.  Other than that, he's terrific.  He is a great collage point guard and a winner.  That is what Carolina needs to build upon for next year.
Of course UNC has more talent coming into the program next year.  I just hope they add a little toughness to go along with the talent. Or I will be writing this same lament next year, as  I have in thirty-two of the thirty-six years as a faithful(?) Tar Heel fan.
The best way to describe how it feels to be a Tar Heel fan is the story from Greek mythology that the boy introduced me to.  Look up the story of Prometheus.  That's how I feel.

Service 'People'

Grandpa Simpson has nothing over me.  All I do all day is sit around waiting to complain about someone.  Today I attempted a simple task: get a repairman for our dishwasher.  Easy, peazy, right?  Fucking hardly!
I called an appliance sales/repairs operation and was greeted not with a "Hello, Sherwood Appliance", but instead I heard "We're having a great day at Sherwood Appliance."  WTF?  I didn't know what to do.  Was I talking to an call machine or a  ridiculous human being?  My only answers was to be somewhat cynical and say " Well, I'm glad your having a good day... but I'm not.  I need a repairman.  Is this the place to call?  Puddin' then asked my what I needed done and after telling her, she asked me what make my dishwasher was.  I told her it was a Miele - pronounced Mee-la.  She corrected me, saying it was a Mee-lee. Now I'm pissed.  First off, I don't like to be corrected, secondly, she's fucking wrong.  It is not Mee-lee, it's Mee-la.
So within thirty seconds, this moron has tried to be cute and funny and then incorrectly corrected me.  I wanted to fucking scream at her, but of coarse I have no really choice because I need a repairman.  Puddin' then told me that Mee-la's need to repaired by Mee-la repairmen and they couldn't do it.  Fucking great.  Thanks for all your help you moron.  I took the high road and didn't yell and scream at her concerning her stupid phone manners, but the longer I sit and stew about it, I still may.  The question is: WTFWKD? (What The Fuck Would Keener Do)
Now I sit and wait because after having to call Toronto, a Mee-la repairman will call me to arrange a time for an appointment.
I JUST WANT MY FUCKING DISHWASHER FIXED.  IS THAT SO FUCKING HARD?

I'm Baaaaaaaack!

    Sorry to all of you out there who have been waiting impatiently for my latest bunch of crap (ha, ha, ha!).  I have a really good excuse: I'm fucking lazy!  Bottom line, that's it.
    However, I have renewed motivation today, for some unknown reason.  After all, what do I have to complain about?  I DON'T WORK and they pay me to stay home.  As Michael in my last class said "Sweet".  
   Today, a short trip to the bank gave me three opportunities to go fucking crazy.  First; I get to the bank and there are few parking spots available.  Three losers, and I'm quite sure they are losers; are outside having a smoke.  Not only are they stupid enough to stand outside in the cold weather,  just for a smoke, they are standing in one of the few available parking spots.  Just smokin' and bullshittin'.  Nice.  I should have fucking ran them over.  Gawd forbid that I should interrupt their precious smoke.  What?  You couldn't fucking smoke somewhere else?  Oh no, they block a parking spot.  That is one reason I believe in Charles Barkley's philosophy of being able to kill two people a day to thin the heard of the stupid.
    Next I go into the bank and when I get near the front, this fucking women is taking forever, about some 'problem'.  What drove me crazy was what she was wearing.  She got the basic  sweat pants, frumpy skidoo boots and nascar/snowmobile type bomber jacket.  What was fucking unbelievable was the plethora of autographs on the jacket from legendary 'monster truck' drivers like 'Gravedigger' and the likes.   I couldn't recognize most; mainly because I would rather be drawn and quartered than to go to a 'monster truck' event.   Classy.
    Then on my way home I go to turn at the very busy turning lane, heading north off of the Sherwood Park Freeway.  Unfortunately I  can't turn because, two little puddings are taking Rover for a walk, despite not having a 'WALK' sign.  Here is one of the 2/3 busiest corners in a very busy Sherwood Park and the line of cars must wait for these two retards who must cross with their dog, NOW.  Fucking idiots.  Again you should be able to run people over, who prove that they are too stupid to live (my decision).
    Well, two weeks until the big dance and my annual humiliation at the hands of my beloved Tar Heels.  Not this year baby!  I not penciling them in past the first round, unless they play the Sisters of the Blessed Virgin Mary Community Collage in the second round.  They are softer than tissue paper.  You are warned.
My only worry is that greasy bastard Calapari will win.  Please God, no!  How about Ichabod Crane and the Orangemen?  Ick.  Crybaby Sha-chef-ski? Double ick.  Kansas?  Na. Ohio State?  Not likely.  Maybe I will go for Michigan State.  I like Izzo.  Whatever, all the teams suck this year.  The one and done is killing collage basketball.
    Now how will I be able to convince my boss Rob that I am really sick on that opening day Thursday, so I don't have to go to the office and work?  Any ideas...????